The Show Goes On

12:15 pm; Sat, Apr 30; Banter Headquarters (my living room couch):

Roommate: What games are on tonight?

Me: (dejected)...none.

Roommate: Dammit. I was kinda planning my day around that.

Me: (increasingly dejected)...Guess we're hittin' the Palace early.

We're all gonna have to find another vice this evening. Deprived of playoff ball for the first time in two weeks, it's looking like a more standard Saturday night. A not-so-fast but definitely furious first round came to an equal parts unexpected and awesome conclusion last night, when the Memphis Grizzlies finally took down their first playoff series, likely driving the final stake into the Timmy D Spurs' coffin. While San Antonio and Orlando have a few extra weeks to stare at the drawing board they're now facing, the teams that upset them look to keep their slim title hopes alive as the curtain draws on the Second Round:

(1) Chicago Bulls vs. (5) Atlanta Hawks

Count me among the many who are absolutely astonished that the Hawks are still alive. I was just wrong. Wrong about The Collins Effect. Wrong about Atlanta's bench. Wrong about the Magic being the more motivated team. That being said, there's a large gap between a sketchy 4-seed that's played up and down all year, and the 1-seed who just faced a feisty open-round foe and made most of the important playoff-type adjustments in their first test. The Hawks don't match up terribly with the Bulls, but having no answer for Rose - either on D or as an opposing gun (don't give me any of that Joe Johnson bulls***) - will hurt mightily. Chicago's a much more sound defensive unit than Orlando, and if the Hawks are unable to score more than they did in Round 1, an offensive powder keg like the MVP could be enough to blow this one open.

Bulls in 5

(2) Miami Heat vs. (3) Boston Celtics

This series is going to be, by far, the best of the 2nd round. For so many reasons. Not only does it figure to be the most competitive from a basketball standpoint, but it also pits Lebron against the team that ended his Cleveland era in the most depressing way possible, and wages the battle of Good vs. Evil in NBA. Everyone knows the Heat; an arrogant trio of young superstars copping out to the fast-track to the Finals. Meanwhile, Boston's stars came together to fight for an elusive title after 10+ years of loyal soldiering. They Did the Right Thing; sacrificing their own games for the team's sake, having each others' back, making those around them better, playing every playoff game like a Game 7. They're the anti-Heat, and as such, 90% of the World will be cheering for them.

Either way, this series looks to go seven. It'll be the most top-heavy team in NBA history, vs. depth and balance, swagger vs. playoff savvy, ambition vs. pride. The Celtics know their time is now; that their Big 3 are all at 100% is a slight miracle, and with Rondo clicking, they look much better than they did in March. Their obvious concern is a certain #6; the one who's no doubt revenge-hungry and a threat to keep their best scorer on his toes every possession. Pierce covered Lebron very well in '08, but since then he's just gotten older and Bron's gotten better; it will be different this time around, especially with Wade looming. Both are capable of winning games on their own, but will need to thrive in the halfcourt together to win; something they've struggled with all year. The key to this series figures to be Chris Bosh; KG is his Jason Voorhees of potential playoff matchups, and a lack of consistent production from him could tip the scales Boston's way. JO's done an admirable job of defending the rim from a wheelchair, and if he can reasonably imitate Perkins' role, the Heat's inability to crack the Celts' D, combined with a lethal dose of kiddie-pool shallowness, should finally vindicate us from the Heat Wave.

Celtics in 7

(8) Memphis Grizzlies (!!!) vs. (4) Oklahoma City Thunder

'Nuff respect to Memhphis. Their 2nd-best player went down and they still pulled off a historic upset against the Spurs of all teams. That's f***ing awesome. I'd love to be blissfully ignorant and realistically act like they're going to beat OKC, but I feel like they'll have to settle for winning my fandom, because the Thunder are going to work them. There were 3 keys to Memphis' upset: Gasol and Randolph wore the thin front line out; Conley broke Parker down off the dribble a lot; Memhpis' frantic, energetic defense rattled the Spurs' collected attack. All 3 of those factors play right into OKC's strengths, as Westbrook is a nightmare to beat, Ibaka/Perkins are probably the best/toughest defensive post combo in the NBA, and OKC's a young team that will beat your press and punish you in transition. This is where Gay's absence will bite them; despite being an excellent defender, Shane Battier's not long or athletic enough to stop the Durantula; look for the venom to act quickly.

Thunder in 5

(2) Los Angeles Lakers vs. (3) Dallas Mavericks

Dammit, almost thought we had it: matching Spurs and Mavs meltdowns in the first round (too much, I guess). But Dallas showed some playoff grit one time and recovered from a laughable 4th-quarter collapse to close off Portland in 6. They addressed some early flaws, not much unlike the Lakers, who appear to have re-gained some of that championship poise that's eluded them most of this season. They'll have to be hungrier than against the Hornets, as Dallas matches them much better than in previous years: they have two defensive bigs to throw at their feared front line, and a versatile swingman to contend with Odom/Artest. Meanwhile, Dirk gets to face the only 4 in the West who might be softer than him, and Jason Kidd draws his easiest defensive matchup of the postseason. Still, the Lakers, even at 90%, figure to be a tough draw. Gasol's found a perfect target to regain his offensive edge, the Lakers' bench in far more stable than Dallas', and then there's Kobe Bryant (oh yeah, him) who's DeShawn Stevenson's best series away from single-handedly ending the Mavs. (Seriously, how many times will Bryant casually isolate JJ Barea anywhere inside 25 feet before Rick Carlisle completely yanks him? I'm guessing 2nd quarter, Game 1)

Lakers in 6