The NBA's Second Season

The NBA offseason has recently become a hype factory of drama and intrigue, subtweets and WojBombs. An entertainment spectacle unlike few in pro sports, it's almost become a whole new season in itself.

But the 2017 offseason has taken things to new heights of upheaval and chaos. Superstars are being given away, quality players are jumping ship left, right and center, and the NBA's power balance has again been consolidated, while salaries skyrocket to yet new heights. You can almost picture Dr Evil announcing the contracts some of these guys are signing for.

So much stuff is happening, it can be hard to gather everything in the proper context. With that in mind, here's a recap of what we've seen so far, attempting to make sense of it all:

RIP Lob City
What It Means: There won't be enough ball to go around in Houston next year. 

So apparently Doc Rivers pissed off Chris Paul, which is totally logical given both that Rivers is a bad GM with a stubborn attachment to his former players/son, and also that just about everyone pisses off Chris Paul.

Of the three superstar trades this summer, the Paul haul has to be considered the best (more on that to come), netting the Clippers an assortment of established vets, decent prospects, and even a first-round pick.

Meanwhile Mike D'Antoni gets to find touches for two of the NBA's most ball-dominant players with Paul joining James Harden. If Carmelo somehow joins the mix, CP3 might be the best thing possible for his game - both in terms of on-court synergy and Banana Boat Points - but the alpha struggle will no doubt present itself.

Blake Griffin Chills
What It Means: There will be no rebuild for the Clippers.


There's a lot of this stressed importance on star players to win, as though competing for a championship should be their only motivation in life.

Some of us (them) are happier just lamping in a star-filled oasis of beautiful weather and people, where the living's easy, your team has a historical commitment to mediocrity, and the pay is very very good.

Losing Paul sucks, but there's a decent rotation around Griffin, who's definitely capable of handling more of a playmaking role. The Clippers will no doubt take a step back, but they could surprise those who expect them to fall from the West's middle tier.

Property on Waiters Island Now Much More Expensive
What It Means: Last year's free agency loser made the most of his contract year re-run.

Brooklyn Makes Otto Porter a Max Man
What It Means: The Nets are about to hardball a second team into completely cap-fucking themselves.

Chauncey Billups Turns Down Cavs' GM Offer
What It Means: Nobody wants to work for Dan Gilbert once LeBron leaves. 

Chicago Gets Robbed at Gunpoint for Jimmy Butler
What It Means: Tom Thibodeau literally put an automatic weapon to Gar Forman's head, gave him terms on a deal for his best player, forced him to accept, and walked away laughing. 

Joe Dumars. Elgin Baylor. Bryan Colangelo x 2. The Bulls' Gar Forman is just the latest in a line of recent Executive of the Year winners who've either been exposed as poor GMs that caught lightning in a bottle, or completely lost their minds years later.

The Butler trade needs to first be prefaced by the Cameron Payne deal, in which the Bulls gave up several valuable assets for an unproven PG who was sent to the D-League within five weeks. This time trading a guy who, by any measure whatsoever is one of the 12-15 best players in the NBA, they received a similarly hopeless return.

Giving up on Payne, they've acquired yet another unproven PG in Kris Dunn, one whose shooting - the Bulls' main need - was horrendous last year. They took on Zach LaVine, a guy with a torn ACL whose ceiling and value are tied very heavily to athletic ability. They also acquired a top-ten pick in a loaded draft, but were foolish enough to give back their own first-rounder in a trade that was already felonious theft.

Who knows what delusion careened through Forman's head when he made this deal. Either way, Danny Ainge was probably on a rough sleep schedule after seeing what Butler went for. Or at least until...

Robyn Hayward's Instagram was Right
What It Means:Gordon REALLY wanted to finish his Player's Tribune article. 

The Jazz - also down George Hill - look like they're headed back to the lottery. And even though he missed out on both Butler and Paul George, Ainge has added an All-Star each of the past two summers without giving up a single asset. Maybe the best-trading GM in the NBA does know what he's doing here...

Minnesota Looks LEGIT
What It Means: The leap they were supposed to make last year is definitely happening this year.  

Backtracking slightly to the Butler trade: If not for the Bulls' mind-numbing stupidity, I'd be happy about it, as a great player no longer has to waste away his prime on a sad-ass team.

Adding Butler to the Towns-Wiggins-Dieng core is massive in itself for Minny, who then bolstered their bench with Taj Gibson at good value, and snared Jeff Teague for startlingly little (almost makes you wonder...). Spacing could be an issue for them, but even if so, they have assets to spare in a trade for a shooter.

The West figures a bloodbath, but with continued development from Towns, the Butler heist taking both offensive and (more importantly) defensive onus off Wiggins, the addition by subtraction of their worst shooter (Ricky Rubio) and defender (LaVine), and now two quality vets to round out their rotation, the Wolves look like mortal locks for a mid-tier playoff spot, and perhaps more.

Nick Young Signs With the Warriors
What It Means: Apparently they didn't have enough swag already.

Amir Johnson & JJ Redick Sign One-Year Deals with Sixers
What It Means: #TheProcess still has to hit the salary floor somehow.

Dwight Howard Loses Again
What It Means: His legacy might be in stone at this point.

The Nuggets Are Still 'Team Purgatory'
What It Means: Denver really doesn't want a lottery pick. 

Ever since the Denver Nuggets traded Carmelo Anthony - almost seven years ago - the franchise has been on a rudderless quest for mediocrity, unable to compete at the highest level, and unwilling to blow it up and build for the future like so many around them had done.

Acquiring Paul Millsap is yet another step in no real direction for the Nuggets; P-Milly doesn't move the needle enough for them to be anything more than a bottom-rung playoff team. Moreover, it restricts their financial flexibility as they build around Nikola Jokic, while lowering their odds at a good draft pick. All this for a player on the back end of his prime who doesn't fit Denver's developmental timeline at all. Makes you wonder what exactly the Nuggets' endgame is.

OKC Plays Cat Burglar
What It Means: They didn't replace Kevin Durant, but they came damn close (for a season).


A few weeks ago, Paul George made the Pacers acutely aware of his intentions to play elsewhere - as if they hadn't been clear for months - thus setting in motion a series of whirlwind events.

Within a 48-hour period, there were "credibly sourced" rumors tying PG to the Celtics, Cavaliers, Rockets, and obviously the Lakers, none of which seemed very far-fetched given narratives and Indiana's utter lack of leverage. But at the 11th hour: 45th minute, in swooped the Thunder - as out-of-nowhere as a Giannis chase-down block. They basically landed George for the assets gained from dealing Serge Ibaka; assets which have only diminished in value.

This is confusing for several reasons: not only was an elite player again dealt for a paltry offer - circumstances notwithstanding - but there's only a drunk puncher's chance that George will re-sign with OKC. This has the making of an expensive rental, likely full of false hope for a fanbase that just lost Kevin Durant and watched him win Finals MVP 11 months later.

If PG does decide to stick around for some completely untapped reason, then Sam Presti will have actually stolen a superstar from someone else, as difficult a concept as that may be to grasp.

Jrue The Damaja
What It Means: Dell Demps is a gambling man.

Whatever "my body is made of glass" discount Steph Curry took on his last contract certainly does not apply in New Orleans where Jrue Holiday - who for argument's sake has averaged 57 games over the past half-decade - just inked for $25mil/year over the next half-decade.

The 12 games Holiday spent with his wife as she battled a frightening brain tumor last year only slightly skews his spotty health record. This has to call into question the New Orleans training staff, given that he averaged 74.5 games through four seasons in Philly, and the Pelicans' entire roster seems to be perpetually injured.

The Point Guard Market Dries Up on Kyle Lowry
What It Means: Making the last three All-Star teams ain't what it used to be.

In contrast to Holiday's lavish deal, Lowry came off a career year and found a chilling lack of love.

Despite logical rumors pointing to Minnesota or San Antonio, Lowry humbly re-upped with the team he reportedly had "zero interest" in, while only getting three years of guaranteed money.

It comes as a disappointment for a player on the back nine of his career, who took a discount last contract due to late-bloomer and conditioning issues, and now despite becoming an elite PG, finds himself doing it again. This time Lowry is purely a victim of the point guard market; an inundation of talent that already diluted the position's market value was only heightened when half of the 2017 Draft's top ten picks were PGs. Simply put, fewer teams need one than ever.

Conversely the deal is pretty much exactly what the Raptors wanted, neither losing Lowry for nothing, nor paying him the max when he's 36 and most likely in decline. His contract is also infinitely more tradeable should Masai Ujiri decide to hit the Rebuild Button on this core group.

Diamond Stone Traded to Hawks
What It Means: 'Diamond Stone' is probably the new most awesome name in the NBA.

Zach Randolph Signs With Kings
What It Means: A big piece of Grint N Grind has died, along with a bit of my soul. 

The Raptors' Frontcourt Splinters
What It Means: That DeMarre Carroll signing really starting to rear its ugly head. 

Kevin Durant Takes One For the Team
What It Means: The rest of the NBA is fucked.

So Steph Curry supermaxed. Considering the Warriors just had him on one of the best-value contracts in NBA history for three years, he was due.

Durant thus bit the bullet, leaving almost $10mil on the table - a 28% pay cut - so the Warriors had the flexibility to retain Andre Iguodala and Shawn Livingston, two key cogs in their title runs. For all the shade he was thrown last summer after what seemed like a cop-out, there's no questioning his willingness to keep this team together and truly carve a place in history for them and himself.

The Phil Is Gone
What It Means: James Dolan has finally done something sane in his capacity as Knicks owner 

Although it was increasingly clear that Phil Jackson's descent into arrogant senility necessitated his firing as Knicks' president, there are few individuals alive who could be trusted to do the right thing less than Jimmy Dolan.

Although the Straight Shot's lead singer saw fit to make a sound basketball decision for likely the first time in two decades, there are rumblings about that his old habits may not have died hard quite yet. "Better Find A Church" indeed.

The Rich Get Richer
What It Means: Competitive parity has both improved and faltered.

There's two ways to look at this depending on your perspective: The first is that the seemingly massive chasm between the NBA's haves and have-nots has grown even wider, with middling teams like Utah, Atlanta, Chicago and Indiana all losing star players to stronger teams (for little-to-nothing) and being sent back to the drawing board. The Rockets also solidified their talent at the expense of their contemporaries, the Clippers. There's no question that elite talent has been consolidated in a huge way for such a short time period, and the rebuilds will be happening everywhere.


The flipside to this is that we might see a greater modicum of competition atop the conferences, especially in the East where the Celtics - armed with Hayward and whatever assets they reap from their logjam of swingmen - could give the Cavs a run for their money if things break right.

Dealing with Golden State in the West is no doubt more of a daunting task, but the Rockets are mounting an effort, the Wolves will quickly ascend, and perhaps even the Thunder can build around two superstars. For all the rhetoric spewed last year about franchises biding their time and waiting out the Warriors or Cavs, things seem to be trending the opposite way.

Whether this amounts to anything in the way of derailing Cavs-Warriors IV remains unclear, but even if the outlook is grim, you can't blame opposing GMs for a lack of effort thus far this offseason. This is probably the most "Shit or Get Off the Pot" season the NBA's ever had; the shakeup is far from over.

The Rest of the Best: 2013 All-Star Reserves

I'm trying to stay ahead of the curve here; Banter's All-Star reserve ballot is being served up as a sequel to the starters before the coaches screwball everything and I have to write a column about why DeAndre Jordan is an All-Star.

First though, I've been taking some heat from a few readers about a couple of my selections as starters, namely Paul George over Dwyane Wade and Kobe Bryant getting "snubbed" by James Harden. I'll be the first to admit: I'm a huge hater of "reputation votes" and tried to find some underlying bias in these decisions, but still feel as though those two deserve to be there.

Through my jaded eyes, the All-Star game is a representation of the NBA season thus far, and should be an opportunity for the players who've defined it to be celebrated. It's not about who the better player is, it's about who has mattered more this season, that's George and Harden in this case. Let's travel back to the alternate universe where I decide the NBA All-Stars as I explain:

East Reserves

Dwyane Wade
Sure Dwyane Wade is a better player than Paul George, but Miami has been somewhat underwhelming at times this season, and never has it been more apparent that he's the second-best player on his team. Meanwhile, George's sudden eruption after their "franchise" guy went down and their "max" player couldn't cut it as a two-way focal point is the main reason Indiana's leading the Central. He's their leading scorer, gives them 8 rebounds/game from the 3-spot, and - on the League's #1 rated defensive team - is the most versatile, and probably best defender.

Kyrie Irving
Cleveland might be one of the NBA's worst teams, but Irving is without question one of its best young talents and belongs in the All-Star game not only on the merits of his stellar offensive play this season, but as an exciting, dynamic franchise talent that has loudly declared his arrival. There's only so much of a "his team's terrible" argument one can make to keep a player this skilled and - from the League's perspective -marketable out of the lineup (not that this should really influence things, but it's like Blake Griffin's nod as a rookie; it's good for the game).

Luol Deng
The answer to all of the following questions is: Luol Deng

Who is the only player in the NBA logging over 40 minutes/game? ____________

Who has been the best two-way player for a Bulls team that's pacing itself extremely well while their MVP heals up? _____________

Who is probably the most under-rated player in the entire League? ______________ (as evidenced by Shane Battier snaring more votes than him. Seriously)

Who unquestionably deserves a spot on this bench? ______________

There shouldn't really be any more questions.

Tyson Chandler
The 2nd-most important component to the Knicks' sudden dominance, Chandler has been a complete package, obviously defending at an All-World level while upping his scoring and leading the League in FG% by a simply astounding margin. There's an extremely valid case to be made that he should be starting, which even three years ago would've been an absurd notion. As late bloomers go, Chandler's been a stunning surprise, and yet another player Mark Cuban will likely eternally regret not re-signing.

Joakim Noah
Arguably as crucial to the Bulls' early success has been Noah's ever-consistent energy and defensive presence; he anchors an elite defense, disrupting everything around the basket with an irritating tenacity, and doing everything on offense excellently, save for actually putting the ball in the basket. Noah will likely never be a #2.... or 3 scoring option, but has increased his offensive production in Rose's absence, averaging career-highs in scoring and assists (as well as blocks and steals) to help fill the void.


Deron Williams
After some December faltering and Avery Johnson being taken out by Prokorov's elite squad of  covert-ops assassins, Brooklyn's new team has been reeling off some decent-to-impressive games, with Williams finally hitting shots and playing with the kind of swagger he used to show off in Utah before Sloangate. I don't think "over-rated" is the word, but as skilled as he is, it seems absurd that there was ever debate between him over Chris Paul.

Chris Bosh
The final spot on this roster came down to Bosh and Jrue Holiday, and while Holiday is in the midst of a breakout year that will put him in the thick of the MIP conversation all season, Kyrie Irving pretty much stole all his "awesome young point guard on a crappy team" thunder, and having the point guard of a 2nd sub-.500 team here seemed redundant. On the flipside, Bosh - a player who was never known for his toughness or versatility on defense - has manned up this season and spent most of his time effectively playing center, holding his own and producing impressively, while allowing Miami to maintain its optimal lineups. I rarely find room to compliment Bosh, but his and Dwyane Wade's contributions this season are the epitome of "less is more" in terms of the box score.

West Reserves

Kobe Bryant
So, about the whole Kobe thing: both Harden and Bryant are having amazing seasons, and that the Mamba is still doing it at this rate, at this age, is truly remarkable. But to me, this isn't even much of a question. Kobe's been visibly passive on D this year while still unloading on offense; a once-elite defender - the leader of these Lakers - selectively coasting to save energy for offense, on a team whose defensive issues have highlighted what is the most universally disappointing season of any NBA team. All Harden's done is put up similar numbers while still being a great defender, for a team with a better record and much less talent, who are performing above anyone's expectations largely because of him. I'm not sure what other than the weight of Kobe's name earns him the starter's nod, but here he is, an All-Star for the 482nd consecutive season.

Russell Westbrook
There's a lot of things you can say about Russell Westbrook, many of which used to be legitimately negative. As the seasons pass, those items are being steadily eradicated and have left us with the second-best point in the NBA this season. He's the most athletic guard in the League. He's a fearless competitor who plays hard every night (and I do mean every night; he hasn't missed a game in his career yet). He does many things at an elite level, always had the confidence to exert himself when needed, and is developing a much better sense of when to do so. He doesn't even turn the ball over that much anymore. He's a Top-10 player, helping to lead the NBA's best team this season. He's guaranteed not to mail in the All-Star Game and throw down 2 or 3 awesome dunks. Enough said. (for those of you who think I actually use dunks as All-Star criteria, I'm merely mentioning it as icing on the cake, honey on the blunt, chrome on the Bugatti, whatever lingo you like to use)

Blake Griffin
So, for those of you who thought this may have been some insane meta-joke by David Stern on his way out, the Clippers are actually awesome now, and Griffin's been his usual All-Star self. Though his numbers are down (on a team that's so deep their most legitimate rotation issue is finding minutes for everyone within the flow of the game) he's harnessing his athleticism and - especially on defense - playing with more control and focus. As for in-game dunk potential, well, when one's jaw-dropping poster shots have almost become redundant, one's presence in an event with defense as lazy as the All-Star Game is a must.

David Lee
Who needs Andrew Bogut? Lee's larger-than-life play for the surprise of the season makes him a must on the West bench. There's almost a certain algorithm at play here: ~20/10 Guy + Massively Over-Achieving Team + Playoff Solidification + Tough Conference - All-Star Caliber (when healthy) Center = All-Star Appearance. Easy math.

Zach Randolph
People thought Z-Bo was finished. People thought he couldn't be the same player after his injury. People were fucking wrong. Randolph has been the definition of a beast this season with his constant low-post assault of the basket and boards. He gives up quite a bit height and athleticism-wise to most NBA 4s, but makes up for it with raw hustle and pure positioning, leading all non-Dwights in rebounding and serving as the Grizzlies' go-to guy in a balanced attack.

Speaking of Dwight, you may notice he's not here, which I had brief second thoughts about, but don't really regret. Yes, he's been much more impressive over the past couple of weeks, but I haven't forgotten the first month and a half of the season when he was a complete shell of himself, nor can I look beyond the Lakers' utter dud of a campaign and honestly say they deserve a second player here. Sorry, but if the All-Star game is at all a "representation of the season thus far", the Lakers should be sweeping the floor on dead balls after they mowed down so many headlines, didn't hire Phil, and have sucked this much.

Stephen Curry
Like Lee, Curry has been lights-out for a Golden State team that's putting everyone's preseason predictions to shame, and most of the Western Conference on watch. He scores nearly at will, is one of the NBA's most underrated playmakers, and makes up for any size he gives up on D with lightning lateral quickness. The freedom he's been afforded in the backcourt this year without Monta Ellis has allowed him to truly find his role, and leaving no doubt that his team kept the right man.

LaMarcus Aldridge
Honestly, this feels like a bit of a freeroll since Kevin Love's knuckle pushups are the only reason this spot's available to begin with, but lost amidst the shuffling storylines and franchise-altering injuries, is the reality that the Blazers are above .500 in the West, and shallower than Kim Kardashian. Lamarcus Aldridge is still really, really good, and giving this team's fans just one reason not to hang themselves. So for trucking it out, being consistently awesome, and not making the slightest bit of pretentious media rumble about your team's long-term predicament, this spot's all yours Mr. Aldridge. See ya in Houston.

What You Missed at Home: Live @ Game 2 in Memphis

Saturday, April 27, 2012; ~2pm - I'm settling into what, for me, is an ideal day: plenty of kush, plenty of good food, two screens of poker tournaments, and (more importantly) a third one showcasing the first day of something I've spent months expecting to miss, and a few beyond that waiting for: The NBA Playoffs.

While I couldn't possibly ask for more without feeling a bit greedy, my good friend (and fellow basketball junkie) Alex Livingston and I were about to sweeten the pot by talking ourselves into going to a playoff game. We struck up a conversation, mused about which series would be the most compelling, and not an hour later, we were booked for an adventure down to Memphis for Game 2. My first live playoff game: Dream about it for 20 years; make it a reality in 20 minutes. Why not?

Now, being the financially irresponsible NBA addict that I am, I thought it was perfectly normal and reasonable to travel 2400 miles on a complete impulse to watch a single playoff game, but judging from the number of crooked looks I got from people inquiring why I was in town, apparently I'm wrong. Oh well.

Rather than base our trip out of Tennessee, we thought it would be neat to check out nearby Tunica, Mississippi: Just a half hour outside of Memphis, it was Vegas on the Bayou, allegedly boasting some of the best conditions for us avid poker players; a fun atmosphere, very soft games and generous gratuities. Then we actually arrived, found out that Tunica's about as fun as a lobotomy, and the geographic visual equivalent of drying paint. I was unimpressed by the game selection, underwhelmed by a five-star steakhouse for the first time in my life, and, in the climax, spent two hours wandering on the side of the highway under scorching sun (you should see my sexy beater tan) in an effort to find a drug store and replace the moisturizer and shaving cream that TSA stole from me. "Why didn't you call a cab?" you might ask? Oh, because for some reason, in a senior-filled tourist trap where nothing except the next casino/hotel is within walking distance, there are no cabs. Not one. Incredible. This would have been problematic for our planned night of drinking, only there were no bars either. Within 20 hours of arriving, we called an audible, booked a new hotel in Memphis, and arranged to fly out two days earlier rather than prolong our misery. Basically, if you're ever planning on going to Tunica, don't.

We arrived in Memphis a few hours before tipoff, got settled in our new digs, and went to explore the vibrant downtown district. For the uneducated, Memphis boasts itself as the home of Blues music, and represents very well. Beale St; the one directly outside of FedEx Forum; is a southern-themed George St; complete with  awesome BBQ, a litany of live music, and people openly drinking copious amounts of beer in the street, not to mention the bars that line both sides of it. Well, when in Rome... After some pulled pork at B.B. King's, some body shots at Coyote Ugly (ya, that Coyote Ugly), and enough beer to give the Duff Man a rough morning, we rolled over to the game. (Might be worth noting at this point that between our booking and arrival, Memphis had suffered the worst 4th quarter collapse in NBA playoff history; so people were drunkenly carrying around a very volatile combination of anxiety and ambition that made us both fear for our lives if the Grizz were to lose again).

By the time we got to our seats, I was buzzing fairly hard, and things hadn't even gotten that aggressive yet. So I stole a move from Grantland's Rembert Browne, and jotted down notes on my phone to recall the evening's memorable moments, when my memory for specific details was sure to be at its worst:

"WhiteOut!!!": We rolled into the arena an hour before tipoff (I wasn't about to half-ass this), and were immediately blinded by the white and yellow combo of "Believe" t-shirts and towels draped over every one of the arena's 18, 119 seats (man, would that job SUCK). It looked pretty cool, but the effect was only amplified as those seats were gradually filled with bellowing fans (and every last one of them was, or at least so says nba.com), wearing the shirts with pride and waving the towels like they were crazed football fans in Pïttsburgh. You see it on TV all the time, but to the naked eye, it's much more profound. Those who chose not to adorn the tees were exposed on the jumbotron, offered shirts by arena staff, and loudly chastised by the crowd until they put one on. #Awesome (peep the photo above)

"Dave": After about half an hour, our section started to fill out; we were joined in the seats on our left by Dave; a pretty cool guy (even after conversing with us at length and not introducing us to his probably-too-hot-for-him girlfriend), who despite his admitted lack of in-depth knowledge, was as enthusiastic a couch-mate as you could ask for. To our right was another couple, one who didn't speak to us all game after Alex offered the (snobby) girl a sincere apology for accidentally snaring her towel. In front of us was a family of four, who were clearly dragged there by the father, an evident hoop-head. More on that in a second...

"beat LA! beat LA!": The pregame was an absolute perfect storm of NBA enthusiasm: a bunch of overly-intoxicated fans losing it for an upstart team that had left them yearning for years, suddenly gotten very good, and more recently, suffered a historic collapse that left them bloodthirsty for revenge. "Beat LA!! Beat LA!!" rang out so loud you couldn't hear yourself think as fans rendered their seats obsolete (if you were "sitting" in the lower bowl, at any given point during most the game, you were likely watching the guy in front of you wave a towel) and erased any regret I might've had about passing up the OKC fans in their favor.

"CP3 isn't human": Seeing Chris Paul play live has been on my Bucket List for several years now, and he still managed to insult my expectations - in a very good way. Watching this relative midget dominate the biggest athletes in the World with more precision and poise than I can put into words is one of those things you just have to see for real; TV just doesn't do it justice. He's no taller than six feet (I've stood right behind him in line at McDonalds and can tell you this very confidently), and yet so far above everyone else.

"Vinnys clueless": Paul's brilliance is starkly contrasted by his coach; watching Vinny Del Negro in person is almost as fascinating, because you get to see all the things that go on off-camera: his puzzled expressions, his overly-animated gestures at awkward moments, his players completely ignoring him. He was the recurring comic relief throughout the game.

"Rudy Gay bad pass reaction": Early in the first quarter, Rudy Gay is streaking along the left wing on the break, anticipating a pass that Mike Conley sends several feet in front of him and clean into the first row. Gay freezes dead in his tracks, holding the triple-threat position for several seconds, while looking over at Conley in disbelief.

"Sager Sighting!!", "Jerry the King": As I know TNT is broadcasting, I've spent a good amount of time playing a slightly easier game of Where's Waldo; trying to find a man wearing the ugliest suit in America amid a sea of white shirts. I spot him chasing down Vinny D for the standard "end-of-first-visiting-coach" interview (rocking something that Brick Tamland would've put together on an off day), and for just a few seconds, wish I was at home, so I could hear this meeting of minds. Of course, as I'm thinking this, the jumbotron zooms in on a conveniently-placed Clippers fan courtside. He's acting very boisterous and drawing the ire of the crowd, when, out of nowhere, appears Memphis native and wrestling legend Jerry "The King" Lawler - rocking a crown and custom "King" Grizzlies jersey - who confronts the fan WWF-style, before locking him in a tombstone piledriver - sending the crowd into complete pandemonium - and putting him down for the count. Standing O. Never mind, I'm glad I'm here.

"Dad n son in front of us": By the second quarter, I've noticed my view of the game has been slightly less obstructed than most in this standing-room-only arena. This is because in front of me is the younger son of the family of four. He's the only one not enjoying himself; in his seat, his entire body from the eyes down stuffed into his 'Believe' tee, watching the game on the jumbotron, clearly caring about as much as he must've in math class earlier that day. The father, to his right, looks down upon him and scorns "...You're watching this on the big screen??", shooting him a look that's half "I paid $230 for these tickets" and half "Who the fuck is this kid that clearly got swapped for mine at the hospital?". I can only hope my children don't turn out that way.

"Gasol passing", "Blake shot selection", "Tony Allen jumper": One of the better parts of watching a game live is letting it speak for itself; you get to focus on it rather than be distracted by shifting cameras, dumb announcers, and all the other shit going on. Some things that I found don't get talked about enough on TV: For all the praise his brother gets, Marc Gasol is a really, really good passer. Not only that, he's extremely versatile; delivering an array of bounce, chest, and outlet passes, out of double teams on the low block, from the elbow, and in transition. So many hockey assists. He out Vlades Vlade.

Blake Griffin's shot selection is, well, interesting. I still can't wrap my head around it because it seems like so many of his attempts are careless forces, but he also holds an ability to control and contort his body midair beyond that of anyone his size, and he hits a decent amount of them. But still, sometimes you're just left shaking your head like "Chris didn't want the possession to end that way" or "If their coach wasn't completely useless he'd instill some discipline and find a way to combine that aggressive athleticism with the best point guard alive and get him better looks".

Tony Allen....Well, as someone on Twitter so kindly put it once; "At 3am, in a dimly lit bar, Tony Allen's jumper would still leave alone". Why Lionel Hollins hasn't tried shock therapy or something at this point is beyond me.

"Horrible reffing & fans not booing jumbotron": Kenny Mauer; I describe him pre-game to Alex as "tech-happy and not the best". By the second quarter, he's already blatantly fucked up three calls - right in front of him and us - unleashing a flood of boos from FedEx Forum's faithful as his mistakes are replayed on the 'tron. I'd normally take this with a grain of salt, but also on no fewer than three occasions so far, the big screen's replayed close calls that went to the Clippers, and not a peep from anyone. Maybe they're not that drunk yet. The next morning, I tried to compliment Mr. Mauer when I was behind him in line at the airport newsstand, only to discover that it wasn't actually him, and awkwardly walk away (right, like anyone else who's not European and in their 50s wears their hair like that).

"Ibaka, Jordan": I've spent far too long making faulty comparisons between Serge Ibaka and DeAndre Jordan offensively. I can't lie to myself anymore. After watching Ibaka absolutely devour Dallas on an impressive array of double-team sneaks, offensive glass putbacks, and even a few of his own moves to the hoop a few nights prior, I had hoped Jordan would come even close to measuring up, but was majorly let down. Somebody needs to convince Donald Sterling to hire The Dream to work with this kid over the summer, because he's an absolute monster of a human being, who could be Chris Paul's next version of Tyson Chandler if he had the slightest idea how to finish after taking contact, or even with a defender in his general vicinity. Vinny D's sure as hell not showing him how. As Jordan takes a weak foul and splits at the line, Vinny and CP3 meet at half; Chris does most of the talking. Vinny looks confused.

"Sirius": If the satellite radio station is what immediately came to mind, please stop reading this. If you're familiar with the goosebump-inducing Allan Parsons Project anthem that's become synonymous with NBA playoff drama since MJ made it famous, then you need no explanation as to why nothing in the World could get me more excited for the fourth quarter of a close game than a bunch of people screaming deafeningly loud over this song.

"Vinny, Blake inbounds play": The climax of Vinny's wayward night comes during a crucial inbounds play where Memphis is (predictably) running a pick-and-pop for Gasol to operate in the high post. I can clearly remember thinking to myself "If they score here, it' over". Vinny's halfway on the court, near foul line extended, screaming for Blake Griffin (remember, this is Blake Griffin, not Tyson Chandler, or even Taj Gibson) to hedge closer to the screen. Blake doesn't move, doesn't even acknowledge his coach, then rises above everyone to intercept the inbound pass.

"Juice = Huge": The one regret I have from this trip (aside from ever setting foot in Tunica) is not making the wisest $20 purchase of my life on a 'Juice is My Homeboy' OJ Mayo tee, and rocking it with pride as he proceeded to throw dirt on the grave the Clippers dug for themselves with a careless attitude towards passing and defensive rebounding. Wouldn't have guessed he'd be the killer down the stretch, but tonight he was in Michael Myers mode. Vinny certainly looks very frightened.

"Z-Bo trans steal = play of game": Something I'd have much more reluctantly guessed would be that a Zach Randolph transition steal to step on the Clippers' neck would be the play of a game in which he shared the court with Blake Griffin, but as soon as it happens, Alex and I both nod assent: that was it. By the time Blake finally throws one down, it's too little too late, but damn...Is it ever still a sight.

"Vinny game over, clipboard": With the game out of hand on its final possession, and Mike Conley playing out the motions at the line, Vinny D is suddenly trying on his best "coach deep in thought" act, thoughtfully exchanging glances between his clipboard, the scoreboard, and his white-flag-waving players after a night of frantic confusion and challenged authority. It was nice of him to provide us with one last laugh, even if he couldn't help CP3 guide them into an overtime thriller for us.

I awoke the next morning in the Memphis Comfort Inn, still clad in my 'Believe' tee with my new Grizz fitted shielding my eyes from light that would surely hurt like fuck. It was a pretty nasty hangover; we joined in the post-game victory celebrations (thankfully we avoided a similar outcome to Game 1, and the ensuing post-game riot) as they spilled out onto Beale St and beyond, finally getting a ride back to our hotel from Ashley, a sweetheart (and not hard on the eyes) bartender who we befriended out of mutual frustration with a drunk homeless guy who crashed our patio table. But that's a story for another day; it was time to go back to Canada, and sadly leave this explosion of NBA playoff excitement behind me.

At least I wasn't going back to Tunica.

The 2011 NBA Awards (or at least how they should be)

I wish I could plan an awards show for the NBA. It would kick so much ass.

I'd start by scrapping the voting process, assigning 25% of the vote value to the players, another 25% to the coaches (applying the "other team" rule), and the remaining 50% to media members, pending the results of clinical bias and GED exams (we need to weed out whoever gave Mike Bibby, Sam Cassell and PJ Brown MVP votes). Those who passed would be required to sit at the front of the crowd during a televised ceremony, and hold up their vote as the award is announced, Slam Dunk Contest-style. Everyone's accountable.

Next, rent out some sick Las Vegas venue, the MGM or something, because this is a celebration, and if you're gonna do it big, that's where you go; a bigger party makes for a more entertaining show. The invitation list would be far from exclusive; obviously all the players and staff, owners and friends, relevant celebrities, former players and superfans (I see you Nav Bhatia! ), but let anybody with the dollar who enjoys the game come be a part of it. Make this the biggest fucking party in the World; get Patron and Grey Goose to sponsor, have bars (with waterfalls) everywhere, hire a few roadies under the table to hand out illicit substances in the bathroom, dancing ladies, fireworks, the whole nine. David Stern would fire me immediately.

Obviously, EJ, Kenny and Chuck would host, with Craig Sager roaming the crowd to harass the attendees, contractually obligated to change suits every commercial break.

The show gets set off with a performance from Deadmau5, with Lupe and Kid Cudi on the mic to set a hype mood. TNT's Big 3 are introduced for a brief comedy intro (you know, where the hosts make fun of people in crowd and they pretend to find it funny 'cause they're on TV while throwing a mental hissy-fit) before getting down to business....

The evening's first two awards are given out Miss USA-style to acknowledge the All-Rookie and All-Defense teams, with the players being called onstage for recognition before the nominees get read:

All Rookie - Second Team: G-Greivis Vasquez, Grizzlies; G-Jordan Crawford, Wizards; F- Patrick Patterson, Rockets; F-Paul George, Pacers, C-Greg Monroe, Pistons

First Team: G-John Wall, Wizards; G-Landry Fields, Knicks; F-Blake Griffin, Clippers; F-Ed Davis, Raptors; C-DeMarcus Cousins, Kings

Evelope please, onto the first award...

Rookie of the Year, presented by Tim Duncan and Darko Milicic

Nominees: John Wall, Washington Wizards; DeMarcus Cousins, Sacrameto Kings; Landry Fields, New York Knicks; Greg Monroe, Detroit Pistons

Winner: Blake Griffin, LA Clippers

The crowd gives him a hearty, yet subdued ovation; one that's slightly muffled by this award having been decided in December, unlike those that so many of his electric dunks evoked. He calmly struts to the stage and accepts the award with Ray Allen-like class, thanks his teammates, family, fans, God of course (he makes no mention of his coach or owner...), formally apologizes to Gallinari and Mozgov, and tells us he's "just getting started" before popping out the mouthguard and sliding off stage.

As a tribute, Griffin's highlight reel from this season runs, beginning with a few nice finesse plays, building up with some nice transition dunks, and gradually ascending towards his truly humiliating facials (showing live reactions from his victims out in the crowd on a picture-in-picture). The hour of footage might be the most entertaining of the broadcast; it's shame it had to come so early. Oh well, on with the show...

Before DPOY, the All-Defense teams get their due:

Second Team: G- Chris Paul, Hornets; G-Andre Iguodala, Sixers; F-Luol Deng, Bulls; F-Tim Duncan, Spurs; C-Tyson Chandler, Mavs

First Team: G-Dwyane Wade, Heat; G-Rajon Rondo, Celtics; F-Kevin Garnett, Celtics; F-Josh Smith, Hawks; C-Dwight Howard, Magic

Defensive Player of the Year, presented by Bill Russell

Nominees: Kevin Garnett, Boston Celtics; Tyson Chandler, Dallas Mavericks; Josh Smith, Atlanta Hawks; Dwyane Wade, Miami Heat

Winner: Dwight Howard, Orlando Magic

Another landslide winner, Howard's all smiles as he hits the stage, especially giddy to be handed the trophy by the greatest defender who ever lived. He leans in to shake Russell's hand, but is met with an icy grip, and the smile quickly fades from his face as Russ shoots him a scornful glare. They awkwardly man-hug for appearances' sake, when Russ, out-of-touch with technology and unaware that his mic hears every word, whispers "Stop being so f***ing friendly to the other team. They're your enemies. And you know they get the ball back every time you needlessly swat it into the stands right?" Howard seems stunned as they part ways, Russell glaring in disdain over his shoulder as he exits stage right. Dwight, appearing shameful and sheepish for the first time in his life, says nothing and shyly saunters offstage. It's sad, but somewhat appropriate, as Howard quite literally had nobody to thank; he was the Orlando Magic's defense this season.

The mood gets lightened by some uplifting music courtesy Wiz Khalifa and Snoop Dogg, dropping several blunts per song while they move the crowd. The atmosphere immediately improves, which is a nice interlude to the next award;

Most Improved Player, presented by the homeless dude the Cavs hired for their play-by-play

Nominees: Dorrell Wright, Golden State Warriors; LaMarcus Aldridge, Portland Trailblazers; Derrick Rose, Chicago Bulls; Demar DeRozan, Toronto Raptors

Winner: Kevin Love, Minnesota Timberwolves

In a category that had so many worthy contenders, it took something historic to set a guy on the lowly Timberwolves apart. The place goes bananas as K-Love, wearing jeans and a "Numb#rs" t-shirt, also accepts the "Best Unathletic White Guy" and "Unlikely Fantasy Monster" awards. Several posses of nominated players begin fights in the crowd, including Master P and Lil Romeo brawling with Michael Beasley and David Kahn (who actually holds his own, landing a few solid hooks). The beef's understandable; this was a heated category, by far the toughest decision this year, but regardless of how shitty his team was, Love's leap from bench utility guy to franchise player couldn't be ignored.

The next segment honors Javale McGee, the Washington Wizards center who made it to the Dunk Contest with his fearless, irrational, and hilarious forays to the hoop, and almost won the damn thing. The big screen displays his Greatest Hits (most of which are Misses), while R Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly" plays gently. Everybody gets a great laugh, and Craig is of course there to embellish upon every minute of Javale's misery. (I'd be crooked not to admit that this video was entirely my buddy Potter's idea, but it had to be a part of any legitimate tribute to the NBA season)

The next musical interlude comes courtesy of Rihanna, followed by Drake; the two join forces in between for a brief medley of "Whats My Name", during which Drizzy finally breaks down tells her everyone on the planet knows her name and to please shut up.

Sixth Man of the Year, presented by Gary Sinise and Paul Giamatti

Nominees: Jason Terry, Dallas Mavericks; Jamal Crawford, Atlanta Hawks; Marcin Gortat, Orlando Magic/Phoenix Suns; George Hill, San Antonio Spurs

Winner: Lamar Odom, Los Angeles Lakers

In a year many contenders spent lots of time starting for injured teammates, Odom made the most of Andrew Bynum's annual breakdown and was a model of consistency and hard work on a Lakers' supporting cast that fluctuated all season. He's (naturally) accompanied to the stage by Ms. Kardashian (who manages to snag half the camera time), and tries to get a few thank-yous out, but has a hard time keeping a straight face amid a downpour of perfume-commercial-related verbal barbs from some buddies out in the crowd.

The mood then turns somber for a tribute to those we've lost since last season: John Wooden, Manute Bol, Lorenzen Wright, Mel Turpin, Shaquille O'Neal... a moving couple of minutes.

Coach of the Year, presented by Gene Hackman and Samuel L. Jackson

Nominees: Gregg Popovich, San Antonio Spurs; Doug Collins, Philadelphia 76ers; George Karl, Denver Nuggets; Nate McMillan, Portland Trailblazers

Winner: Tom Thibodeau, Chicago Bulls

Thibodeau is curiously absent from the ceremony (rumored to be studying Lakers game tape), so Bulls GM John Paxson accepts the award on his behalf: "Landing Tom was a miracle for us; needless to say he worked out a little better than our last coach. He took a talented bunch of players and brought out the best in all of them, adjusted through injuries to key guys, and kept them focused on a goal that exceeded all our expectations. In his first year on the job." Couldn't have said it better.

Prior to the MVP, the All-NBA teams get some respect, being introduced in an All-Star starter-type spectacle with Kanye and Jeezy dropping "Amazing":

Third Team: G-Russell Westbrook, Thunder; G-Rajon Rondo, Celtics; F-Pau Gasol, Lakers; F-LaMarcus Aldridge, Blazers; C-Al Horford, Hawks

Second Team: G-Chris Paul, Hornets; G-Kobe Bryant, Lakers; F-Kevin Durant, Thunder; F-Kevin Garnett, Celtics; C-Amare Stoudemire, Knicks

First Team: G-Dwyane Wade, Heat; G-Derrick Rose, Bulls; F-Lebron James, Heat; F- Dirk Nowitzki, Mavs; C-Dwight Howard, Magic

The stage then clears for the moment everyone's been waiting for...

MVP, presented by Michael Jordan and Charlie Sheen

Nominees: Dwight Howard, Orlando Magic; LeWyane Jade, Miami Heat; Dirk Nowitzki, Dallas Mavericks

Winner: Derrick Rose, Chicago Bulls

As Rose, the youngest MVP ever; clearly humbled by this honor, gets up to accept, a highly inebriated Stan Van Gundy rushes the stage and attempts to steal the trophy, screaming obscenities at the top of his lungs while security removes him. After the brief interruption, Rose says all the right things and leaves to the clicheed "MVP!" chant from the crowd; only this time its legitimacy resonates much deeper. "Why not me?" he asked back in November; seemed crazy at the time, but he backed up every bit of it; his entire team rode his swagger and poise all the way to the East's #1 seed, while he created most of their offense and played out of his mind when they needed him the most; whether during injuries to key guys or against their toughest opponents. The "rose is all in" adidas ads that have been running all night are no joke, he gave the Bulls an incredible season.

The evening concludes with David Stern making a surprise appearance onstage, thanking the fans for their ongoing support, and announcing that there won't be a lockout next season. Or at least that's how it should be.

...And Now For Some Fake Awards...

Tooooonight, coming to you live from a dingy living room in Halifax, Nova Scotia, it's the Halftime Edition of the 2011 Basketball Banter Awards! We've got plenty of trophies to hand out, so let's get into it; grab your popcorn and enjoy the show.

The Justin Bieber Award - Lebron James, Miami Heat: Goes to the player who's been everywhere for the past year, and could honestly use some down time.

Ok, so I know he's the most amazing/most celebrated/most hated player in the NBA right now. That's cool. He delivers a lot of horses to the engine that powers the league's media image. That being said, the press's complete marination in the Heat, and specifically Lebron, has been sickening. Lebron's Twitter account is becoming like Facebook's MiniFeed; information that I don't need to know (or give a fuck about) being served to me unavoidably. This is clearly what Lebron wants; he's embracing his role as the villain because he loves the attention. Let's try not to indulge him so much.

Regards to: Carmelo Anthony, Chris Bosh

The Simmons BeautyRest Award - Jrue Holiday, Philadelphia 76ers: Goes to the player who's having an awesome season and being totally slept on.

Lost in all the crowded MIP talk is Holiday, the second-year point who's showing maturity beyond his years in quarterbacking the Sixers' dysfunctional offense. I brag enough about the benefits of League Pass, but being able to see young emerging players on crappy teams that would never make national TV is among the best. Holiday fits the bill as a creative playmaker who can also fill the basket, as he is often charged with on the offensively-challenged 76ers. His play is unheralded largely because Philly's bordering on Most Irrelevant status; only copping TV time on the wrong end of highlight reels. Only hoop addicts, fantasy buffs and Sixers fans know how nice this guy is, but it shouldn't be long before he forces people to wake up.

Regards to: Wesley Matthews, Al Horford, Arron Afflalo

The Canibus Award - JJ Hickson, Cleveland Cavaliers: Goes to the player who was supposed to blow up this year, and instead has failed to make much of himself.

Hickson had it all this year: Loads of opportunity for playing time. A shitty team with absolutely no expectations. The momentum from an absolute romp in the Summer League. A new coach with a fresh attitude and a soft spot for Hickson's upside. So far we haven't heard much. Hickson's been inconsistent, listless and in and out of Lord Byron's doghouse, contributing to the Cavs' meltdown that has (very creepily) mirrored Miami's season almost game for game.
Regards to: Roy Hibbert, 90% of the Detroit Pistons roster, Darren Collison

The Bobby Boucher Trophy - Blake Griffin, LA Clippers: Goes to the player whose arrival on a new team has had the greatest positive impact.

The way Griffin's taken the NBA by storm this year is most easily likened to a tragic hurricane in terms of the devastation and calamity he's caused for those in his path. The Clippers have managed to sail clear of the storm though, playing their best basketball since the Elton Brand days and now the talk of the league, largely due to Griffin's ridiculous numbers and reckless abuse of opposing baskets. That the Clippers are knocking off good teams is icing on the cake; that the'ye being spoken of in a context other than 'walking joke' is a serious boost that appears to have rejuvenated their entire roster; hell even Baron's playing well now.
Regards to: Amar'e Stoudemire, Carlos Boozer, Tyson Chandler (...and yes, I'm intentionally snubbing Lebron)

(Side note: Blake Griffin has also won the Shawn Kemp Memorial Award for the most exciting/demoralizing dunker, which in completely unrelated news, is being temporarily retired while under review to be re-named "The Blake Griffin Award")

The Tim Donaghy Award - OJ Mayo, Memphis Grizzlies: Goes to the player whose gambling has caused serious issues for himself/his team/the NBA.

Quite the season OJ's having. Already mired in a shooting slump that cost him his starting job, Mayo lost a dime-five to Tony Allen on a redeye card game, couldn't take the loss like a man, and started chirping him. Allen retaliated by whupping Mayo's ass (which became a nationally-blown-up scrum; a rare blemish in an otherwise-quiet season for a violence-enamored league) and punking even more of his minutes; leaving Mayo the latest poster child for superstar irresponsibility, and with his head resting on the trading block.
Regards to nobody; this one's all you man.

The Flavor Flav Award - Darko Milicic, Minnesota Timberwolves: Goes to the player who made a strong comeback from obscurity/adversity to gain relevance again.

To say that Darko's NBA career was going poorly would be like calling Corner Gas uneventful; a polite way of describing a far more profane and morbid reality. He had the misfortune of being born in such a year that his development as an NBA prospect would align perfectly with the "Dirk Factor", which bloated the draft stock of countless European centers over the past decade. This led to his erroneously high selection, and prompt burial on the bench of a deep title contender, under the tutelage of a coach who never much cared for young prospects. This planted firm seeds of frustration in Milicic; seeds that poisoned his career as he bounced from team to team, collecting bench splinters and struggling to fit in; never given room to blossom. His confidence was whittled away until last summer, when he seemed bent on retirement, and the only man stupid enough to give Darko $20 million willingly forked it over...Then a funny thing happened; he actually started playing well enough to take the whole league by notice: Now a legit starting center who's among the league leaders in swats and actually commands attention on offense. It's a long way from reversing his simply awful luck, but given how deep he'd buried himself, any signs of life from Darko should feel redeeming.

Regards to: Gilbert Arenas, Andrew Bogut, and a special D-League shout-out to Antoine Walker

Dunk of the Half - Blake Griffin on Danilo Gallinari
Blake had a very loud coming out party against the Knicks back in November. He dropped 44, including a vicious array of highlight slams, most maliciously targeting Galinari, who found himself hopelessly lost on Griffin Island as he tried to stop a one-man fast break. He just as quickly found himself spun off of by a much larger man in a fit of graceful agility that instantly morphed into destructive power in the form of an ego-shattering tomahawk...Right on poor Gallo's head...And thanks to the glory of the internet, he (nor any of us) will ever forget.



Regards to: JR Smith on Gary Neal, James Harden on JJ Hickson, Blake Griffin on basically anybody

Ham of the Half - Ron Artest, LA Lakers; Goes to the player who, through continued on and off-court incompetence, has insulted any/all expectations.

When the Lakers signed Ron Artest before last season, the impression was that he would fill Trevor Ariza's shoes as a defensive-minded swingman who could hit jumpers and exist within the triangle. While he managed to survive the first season well enough to help LA to a title, winning it is apparently the worst thing ever to happen to him. After auctioning off what should've been his most prized possession (regardless of his philanthropic motivations, the whole thing seemed like a publicity stunt), Artest has been mired in a haze of passive defense and bricked jumpers, appearing to be more aptly pissing off Kobe Bryant than anything else. A lot of reality checking needs to be done in Lakerland, starting with its usual suspect.

Regards to: Baron Davis (1 week won't save you), Samuel Dalembert, Evan Turner

The A-Team Award - Boston Celtics; Given to the team who, at this point, looks like the best in the NBA.

This was tough. Really fuckin' tough. Not only because I still somewhat despise the Celtics for indirectly destroying my favorite player as I knew him, or 'cause the Spurs have been very, very good; the best record in the NBA in its tougher conference. This was tough because nobody really looks like a favorite; Dallas lost Butler for good and looks lost without Dirk, LA's got a serious championship hangover, Miami's still got lots to prove and Orlando's still waiting on the jury. But looking at what Boston's done with what they've had, it's tough not to fear them. They've enjoyed their usual hot start, but it's been maintained longer through a (somewhat) tougher conference, nasty early schedule, and a barrage of injuries. Jermaine O'Neal's played like 5 minutes all year. Shaq's been hobbled. Garnett and Rondo have each missed 2 weeks, and Kendrick Perkins is still on the horizon. They still have the best record in the East. Make no mistake; this will be the hungriest team in the NBA come playoffs, and at full strength (which, if you're a skeptic, looks just as shaky for every contender out West) the way everyone else is playing, they might be its best. They have the size, experience and depth to match just about anybody, their defensive intensity is unreal and their cohesiveness is unmatched...and Rasheed's coming back? Good luck.

Regards to: San Antonio Spurs, Miami Heat (post-Cleveland), Dallas Mavericks (w/Dirk)

Halftime Hardware: The Mid-Season Awards

The regular season grind's just about hit its mid-point; as teams cross the 40-game mark, the conversation's shifted from early season adjustments to All-Stars, deadline deals and the earliest glimpses of the playoff bracket (only 3 more months...). Seems like an appropriate time to revisit the race for the NBA's individual awards and hand out a little Halftime Hardware:

Rookie of the Half - Blake Griffin, LA Clippers
Getting the obvious out of the way, Griffin's taken the League by storm like few rookies ever have; dropping double-doubles almost as often as his devastating dunks that have fans itching for All-Star Saturday (sorry, Lamar). What's more, he's made people care about the Clippers; a dynamic talent that's already borderline dominant in the NBA after three months and putting LA's Other Team on the map. Looks like they found a keeper, hopefully they dont screw this one up.
Regards to: Landry Fields, John Wall, Demarcus Cousins

Most Improved Player - Kevin Love, Minnesota Timberwolves
From the obvious to the opposite; the MIP race is not only very crowded but comprised of players from all walks of life. MVP-calibre point guards, wily veterans, young gunslingers, emerging journeymen; there's a dozen players who could make a very legitimate claim to this trophy. Love gets it because he came into this season facing an unclear role and inconsistent minutes, and immediately forced Kurt Rambis to keep him on the court with his versatile offensive array and utter dominance on the glass. People spoke of Moses Malone's 30/30 30 years ago, well that's also the last time somebody other than Dennis Rodman (also Malone) averaged more rebounds than Love is this season. Over one summer he seamlessly made the transition to legitimate star player; a much tougher leap than the typical breakout year that wins a player this award, especially on a team as dysfunctional as the Wolves. A lot of guys in this running simply adapted to increased roles; Love demanded one with his play and has done nothing but prove himself right.
Regards to: Raymond Felton, Dorrell Wright, Wesley Matthews

Coach of the Half - Erik Spoelstra, Miami Heat
Don't think there's much to discuss here. Miami came into the season with insurmountable expectations, started as horribly as anyone could've imagined; everyone was calling for Spoelstra's head. Spo made some defensive tweaks, began fast breaking and moving the ball more, commanded the respect of his players; suddenly Miami's the hottest team in the NBA. It's almost as open-and-shut as the ROY race, and almost as many innocent people are being shamelessly dunked on.
Regards to: Doc Rivers, Tom Thibodeau, Nate McMillan

Defensive Player of the Half - Dwight Howard, Orlando Magic
It seems almost redundant giving this trophy to Dwight again, and I tried long and hard to find someone who could legitimately swipe it way from him. But Howard's been way too much of a force; 2nd in rebounds, 3rd in blocks, becoming more and more the focus of dramatic overhauls to the opposition's offensive scheme. The numbers don't tell the whole story because Howard's long been the NBA's MAP (most avoided player); his mere presence lowers comfort levels, while also being the safety net for the likes of (formerly) Vince Carter, and (currently) Hedo Turkoglu. His importance can't be understanted because because of a few missing digits.
Regards to: Rajon Rondo, Tyson Chandler, Andrew Bogut

Sixth Man of the Half - George Hill, San Antonio Spurs
A fair share of the blame for the Spurs still being on top of the West (with Timmy D playing such a small role) can be pinned on Hill's emergence as a versatile cog off the bench; a combo guard who can score and distribute, always playing aggressive defense and carrying the business-like edge of a veteran Spur, and not a ringless newcomer. The Spurs hardly lose a step with him in the backcourt alongside Parker or (more rarely) Ginobili; another diamond dug out of the deep rough by RC Buford.
Regards to: Jamal Crawford (barely eligible), Serge Ibaka, JR Smith

MVP - Derrick Rose, Chicago Bulls
In what's shaping up to be the most compelling MVP race in recent memory, Rose has backed up his early season boasting with outstanding play that's kept Chicago near the top of the East despite injuries to both their other stars. Rose has been attacking the hoop with the same devastating quickness and athleticism that's scared defenders since he came onto the scene, although the sudden range he's developed has forced respect of his jumper and given him all the more room to operate, to the tune of almost 9 assists a game to run with 24 points. His biggest game have come against top competition and his attack has seamlessly shifted between assaulting weak perimeters and exploiting mismatches in the post, as needed. What more could you ask of the guy?
Regards to: Amar'e Stoudemire, Dirk Nowitzki, Dwight Howard

All-NBA

First Team - G- Derrick Rose/Kobe Bryant F- Dirk Nowitzki/Amar'e Stoudemire C-Dwight Howard

Second Team - G- Rajon Rondo/Russell Westbrook F- Lebron James/Kevin Durant C-Pau Gasol (because he's played half the season there and no true center deserves this)

Third Team - G- Deron Williams/Chris Paul F- Carmelo Anthony/Kevin Love C- Lamarcus Aldridge (see above comment)

While the League's individual Awards do a good job of singling out the most significant accomplishments among the season's many, their scope's pretty narrow, leaving plenty of deserving players without recognition. To celebrate their efforts, check back later this week for the Halftime version of the Basketball Banter Awards; celebrating the best (and worst) of the rest of the NBA...