What the Fuck Just Happened - Making Sense of the Trade Deadline

This year's NBA Trade Deadline was supposed to breeze through with the lightest of whimpers. Even in today's era of internet hyper-coverage, where every transaction is slid under the microscope, this was supposed to be a mundane checkpoint, bookended between earlier blockbusters, and an upcoming offseason of pure salary-spiking ridiculousness.

We were nonetheless treated to the usual cavalcade of rumors that seemed too ridiculous to conceive ("...KG to the Wolves sounds realistic"), but instead of another flat-lined anticlimactic event, the NBA's front offices unleashed a dizzying typhoon of player movement that has altered the league's landscape - both in present and future - more than any deadline in recent memory.

In all, 37 players were traded - the most in deadline history. Serious playoff implications were altered, building teams have forged their paths or changed their courses for the future, an entire team's worth of B-list guards have new area codes, and against any conceivable odds, Kevin Garnett plays for Minnesota again.

So much went down yesterday. Let's try and figure out what it all means:


HEAT GET: The Brothers Dragic
SUNS GET: Danny Granger, Justin Hamilton, two first-rounders
This was kind of a bum deal for the Suns, who were forced to trade an All-NBA guard for 20 cents on the dollar after he publicly announced this week that he wouldn't be re-signing with them. It killed Dragic's trade value (you can't leverage much when every GM you're dealing with knows you're about to lose him for nothing) but made Phoenix's options pretty clear. Shitty as the situation may have been, they totally did it to themselves by quizzically signing athird starting point guard last summer, forcing the ball out of Dragic's hands. As such, they've lost arguably their best player for a pitiful return, less than 10 months after he seemed like a no-brainer franchise cornerstone.

Meanwhile, Miami obviously gets a desperately-needed upgrade to the NBA's worst point-guard tandem, finding themselves a capable floor general to spell Dwyane Wade, and a dangerous perimeter weapon on a team that isn't exactly scoring a ton this year. The Heat are now mortal locks to make the playoffs in a depleted East, and could be a poisonous first-round matchup if fully healthy. Even with their laughable bench, a Dragic-Healthy Wade-Deng-Bosh-Whiteside starting lineup should scare the crap out of any team in the East. This move also heavily decreases the odds of Miami blowing things up in the near future, diminishing the value of the picks they sent the Suns. Even if Dragic bolts in the offseason, Miami will benefit from the cap bump and be able to eye a similar replacement.
GRADES: Suns, D; Heat, A

THUNDER GET: Enes Kanter, Steve Novak, Kyle Singler, DJ Augustin
JAZZ GET: Kendrick Perkins' Expiring Contract, Grant Jerrett, the draft rights to Tibor Pleiss (whoever that is), protected Thunder 1st-rounder, Pistons 2nd-rounder 
PISTONS GET: Reggie Jackson
So THIS is what becomes of one of the NBA's most long-time-coming exoduses, the uber-useless Kendrick Perkins reaching the end of an epic contract, and finally holding trade market value. Losing Jackson hurts but had to be done (see: Dragic, Goran), but Kanter is a possible stud who can finally be an OKC post threat, and has one of the NBA's best help defenders beside his own reasonably bad defense. He's still got room to grow, but even now is a real contention-sway for the Thunder. OKC also nabbed Kyle Singler and DJ Augustin who will immediately become rotation players, and better wing options than Jeremy Lamb and Andre Roberson. My only hesitance towards this trade is that I don't think Scott Brooks is very good at his job, and don't necessarily trust him to bring all these new faces together in time.

The Jazz got rid of Kanter, because they had to. He was the definition of a lame-duck starting for Utah, who had to play up his trade value, but also had Rudy Gobert demanding minutes. The clear move was to sell high now on Enes, playing his best ball ever, and sandwiched in their frontcourt. I'm not convinced they got enough. Sure the Perkins cap space is nice, and they have more future picks (though neither of them are that great), but I don't believe all cap space is created equal. and this is Salt Lake City Cap Space, which is such a player magnet with its vibrant nightlife and great weather (the place hosted the Winter Olympics for fuck's sake). But this summer's all about over-spending anyways.Who knows, maybe Utah has another international monster on their hands in Tibor Pleiss. If his Google picture's any indication, it's a safe bet:

The Pistons are getting to the playoffs this season, but beyond that might be strapped with Jackson - who's apparently looking for a near-max deal? #senile - in the summer. Jackson and Brandon Jennings don't make for the most compatible backcourt, and with the cap skyrocketing, there will certainly be teams putting pressure on the Pistons for the restricted free agent. So Detroit gets to solidify one of the most unlikely comebacks in modern NBA, lose to Atlanta in the first round, then jump in a blender a few weeks later. It's been an interesting first year for Stan Van Jeremy. Either way, he didn't sacrifice a lot to roll the dice here.
Grades: Thunder, A-; Jazz, C; Pistons, B

SUNS GET: Marcus Thornton, Cavs' 2016 first-rounder
CELTICS GET: Isaiah Thomas 
Not only did the Suns get rid of Dragic, but also dumped the free agent signing that spurned him, for a crappy pick and a likely low-value dice roll in Thornton. There's the potential for Thornton to catch fire on certain nights - especially in Phoenix's fast offense - but he takes a lot off the table (defense and ball movement chief among them) and only on last year's Nets has ever been on a Playoff team. So if you're keeping score at home, in the past 7 months, so far the Suns have had an All-NBA guard (Dragic), a borderline starter at by far the NBA's deepest position (Thomas), and after trading both, Marcus Thornton might be the best player they got back.

I'm not sure what to make of this for the Celts. Presumably they want as many lottery balls as possible and a chance to let Marcus Smart get minutes, but this move is very counter-productive to both those outcomes. Still, getting Thomas for such a bargain gives Danny Ainge another asset to bring to the table as he attempts to acquire entire draft rounds and you can't truly fault Boston for pulling the trigger.

Why would Phoenix just give Thomas away like that after signing him and trading Dragic...?
Grades: Suns, C-; Celtics, B

SUNS GET: Brandon Knight
BUCKS GET: Michael Carter-Williams, Miles Plumlee, Tyler Ennis
SIXERS GET: Picks (of course)
Well, because of this clusterfuck of a shuffle involving three teams, and motives of all walks.


First off, the Suns justified their Thomas-dump by basically upgrading him to Knight without giving up their identity or a key piece in their rotation. They now field an intriguing hybrid backcourt that can score in a variety of ways, and defend both guard spots better than any iteration of Dragic/Thomas/Eric Bledsoe they've fielded over the past year. This move signals their desire to remain in the fight for the West playoffs without Dragic, but they're highly unlikely to hold off the upgraded Thunder. Either way, they've won this trade for now,

I don't know what the fuck the Sixers are doing at this point. Their commitment to tanking is infuriatingly ass-backwards. Wake me up when they actually begin the "rebuild" phase of rebuilding.

The Bucks got a better fit for their dynamic, position-amorphous roster, yet another long, rangy defender, and a perfect pupil for Jason Kidd (Kidd was once a young PG who couldn't shoot, MCW is currently a young PG who can't shoot; Kidd wanted a PG who didn't look for his shot first, MCW is currently a young PG who can't shoot - you see the pattern here). We're about to find out how Carter-Williams can contribute on a team that isn't horrible, but odds are he'll mesh well with the Bucks' versatile core, and learn a thing or two from Kidd, with the highest upside rating in this trade. Plumlee was on Alex Len Island in Phoenix, and will be a welcome boost to a Bucks' frontcourt that's been leveled by injuries.
Grades: Suns, A; Bucks, B+; Sixers, D

BLAZERS GET: Arron Afflalo, Alonzo Gee
NUGGETS GET: Thomas Robinson, Will Barton, Victor Claver, lotto-protected 1st rounder
The Nuggets were widely-rumored to be shopping pretty much everyone on their roster this side of Jusuf Nurkic, but their deadline deal amounted to the shipment of just two players, bolstering the Blazers' perimeter with guys who aren't Nic Batum.

Batum's disturbing regression has been pretty much the lone wart on what's otherwise been a stellar season for the Blazers, and this move will allow them field more lineups with a Lillard-Matthews-Afflalo combo that will be a nightmare from the perimeter. Already a B-level contender, the Blazers gained a good sixth man for a bunch of fringe rotation guys. Huge win.

And the Nuggets failed to do anything to rescue them from the purgatory they're stuck in. What are the odds this pick falls out of the first round's bottom-five? Also, if anyone's taking bets on Brian Shaw's firing this summer, let me know.
Grades: Blazers, A; Nuggets, C


WOLVES GET: Kevin Garnett's Ghost
NETS GET: Thaddeus Young
I mean, it's kind of poetic in a way, A former legend who should've retired by now, returning to the franchise he wasted away his prime in, to waste away his final years on a team that's winning nothing but the Lotto during his NBA lifespan. Why Garnett would waive his trade clause to come here is sort of beyond me, but as he becomes increasingly irrelevant as a player, hopefully he can impart some wisdom on the Wolves' youngsters instead of being a biting, barking jackass.
Grade: I still can't really get over that this actually happened.

ELSEWHERE:

- The Wizards and Kings swapped backup point guards, trading Ramon Sessions for Prof. Andre Miller, in a trade that seems kind of backwards (wouldn't the team with the young superstar PG be the one wanting the savvy veteran leadership?).

- Javale McGee got dumped on the Sixers, which is perfect because the Sixers want to suck for the next half-decade and McGee is a $12 million-man who's played in 16% of games in the past two seasons. But hey, they got a draft pick out of it!

- The Pistons got Tayshaun Prince back (yawn).

- The Sixers, Rockets and Knicks did a jig that saw KJ McDaniels land in Houston with Pablo Prigioni, Isaiah Canaan fall to Philly (where he's about to become the fantasy deadline-value hero), and the Knicks actually acquire a draft pick for once.

- And apparently Alexey Shved got traded too. Real Earth-rattler right there.

The Trade Deadline shook things up for several teams in terms of long-term outlooks, but also likely solidified this year's race for the playoffs. It will take a massive curveball for OKC, Miami and Detroit not to fill the remaining un-booked tickets to the postseason dance, and all three should carry somewhere between reasonable (Pistons) and terrifying (OKC) upset status.

The dust is still settling, and the outcomes won't be settled for months (or perhaps years in some cases). Maybe by then we'll have wrapped our heads around the most unexpectedly wacky trade deadline ever.

Putting the NY in Anthony

Carmelo Anthony is at what many would call a "crossroads" in his now decade-old NBA career.

Blessed with talent that saw him run step-for-step to the finish of an ROY race with a player currently being legitimately questioned as the best ever, Anthony has faded somewhat amid his star-studded Draft class, perceived by many as "only a scorer", "a me-first player", "he hasn't grown up", "he doesn't make his teammates better", or most damning "he doesn't win".

Just as those perhaps jaded reputations appeared ready to manifest themselves - coming off Anthony's most disappointing season, this was seen by many as his year to put up or shut up as an elite NBA player - Melo came out and beasted the season's opening quarter, legitimately putting his name in the MVP debate for the first time in years by leading the Knicks to a 23-10 mark heading into last night's home showdown with the Celtics. He was playing more inspired defense, passing more, playing within the flow of the game and attacking from the inside/out as defenses and the needs of his team dictated. More importantly, Melo was having fun, feeding off his teammates, and winning; he was beginning to look like a leader.

As most of you probably know by now, things didn't generally go very well for the Knicks last night, for three reasons:

1) They let an aging Celtics team employ their just-as-aging bullying tactics against them, gaining a mental upper edge (in what is now an absolute rivalry) through physical play and merciless Kevin Garnett-fueled vitriol to offset the absence of their best player.

2) They allowed said Celtics team - who have looked quite lost for most of this season - to beat them on their home floor.

3) Following the game, Melo decided to try and confront the Celtics (it appears Garnett in particular) not only outside the locker room, but on the way to their team bus, in an apparent attempt to show them that he's either "hard as fuck" or a very sore loser, which regardless of intent is bad for its own set of reasons:

a) It was videotaped, all over ESPN and Twitter within the hour, and surely drawing tons of negative attention to the Knicks, and in general the NBA (any time "police were on hand as a precaution" to get a basketball team to its bus, people tend to look at it negatively).

b) Emperor Palpatine, sorry David Stern in his increasing senility will probably suspend Melo for 15 games and fine him $5 million as he continues his "Fuck You, I Made You" Retirement Tour, harshly penalizing anyone who's dared defy his Orwellian reign.

c) This says a lot about who Carmelo Anthony still is. And frankly, it's not good. While he's putting it together on the court this year, a childish mentality still prevails: "It was like being in the schoolyard" recalls one witness.

Melo certainly hasn't helped himself much over the years.

This incident adds itself to portfolio that would make any self-respecting professional (or amateur criminal) blush: a vicious sucker-punch in the middle of an in-game skirmish followed by his running away like a scared rabbit, a DUI arrest following his worst game of the season, an appearance in a DVD bootlegged in his native Baltimore that advocated violence against those who co-operated with police, a confirmed affair with a teammates' wife, a well-publicized bar fight with someone approaching his own wife, and an arrest at an airport for marijuana possession that was cleared when his friend "claimed he owned the bag" (now go ahead, try and figure out which of those colorful moments I just made up).

This isn't a matter of basketball; the man's clearly very talented. It's a matter of being a man at all; not acting like a child. It's realizing that you're not in the schoolyard anymore, but on a professional sports team, hell, in the highest-profile city in the World, and that people are tired of asking "when will he just get it?".

Melo's spent most of his career cultivating an image of on-court selfishness, strongly buoyed by his off-court antics. When things seemed to turn the corner basketball-wise this season, the evident hope was that he'd, for lack of more eloquent deliveries, stop being such an idiot. I'm sure he thought he was being "hard" last night, letting the Celtics know he wouldn't back down or be rattled, but he showed not only that he is very rattled by a not-even-midseason loss, but that he's not yet ready to put the team above himself. He might've looked like a leader the past couple months, but this is hardly evidence of it.

What a truly effective leader does in that situation is highly subjective and dependent on those he leads, but pretty much universally dubious would be to draw more attention to the loss - and the whole organization - in a negative light through a selfish act that drums up a whole new round of questions about your character.

This obviously comes at an inopportune time for New York, who seemed to be in the midst of a dream season, and are now seeing the first of seemingly increasingly inevitable signs that something about the Knicks will come undone, be it Patrick Ewing's knees, Isiah Thomas' sanity, James Dolan's chequebook, or Michael Jordan's sense of mercy.

For Melo's Conscience not to add itself to that list of reprehensible Manhattan basketball terms, he needs to put himself in perspective here; realize the importance of his behavior off the court, as well as on it. His reputation is on the line, and even if that doesn't worry him, the balance of millions of dollars, the hopes of millions of fans, and the fate of a franchise is. He needs to embody a more mature mentality, one that focuses on beating KG on the court instead of off it, or at the very least resolves things in their next meeting instead of in the parking lot. This team wants to win a championship, and that takes more than what Melo's demonstrated thus far.

Carmelo Anthony has to realize once and for all that the team - much like this situation he very easily could've walked away from - is bigger than himself.

Game Notes: Knicks @ Celtics, Game 2

If you looked up "bad timing" in the dictionary, you'd find something about a Blue Rodeo song, the Adrian Peterson who plays RB for the Seahawks (the one who you need to type "other Adrian Peterson" to find on Google), and a picture of me running after a bus in the rain or something.

Very rarely in my life do things line up conveniently for me to indulge in basketball the way I'd like, but with school having ended last week, my bartending gig not starting til next week, and the US government going all Monty Burns on my other line of work, I'm suddenly left with the most free time of the year when I need it the most; the hectic 2011 Playoffs kicked off with the best opening weekend in recent memory, full of upsets, game-winners, and huge performances.

One of the highlights was a highly-contested tilt at the TD Garden, that saw the Celts narrowly escape thanks to Ray Allen, after they spent 3/4 of the game in limbo, almost got the game handed to them by the refs, then had Carmelo finish the job. Tonight's slate of three Game 2s kicks off with their shot at redemption; a chance to sting the Knicks at home and re-assert themselves before traveling to hallowed Madison Square Garden, where playoff excitement is sure to be at a fever pitch. Can it live up to the excitement of Game 1? Let's join EJ, Kenny and Chuck...

- Billups is out, so is the jury on whether (Pretty) Toney Douglas can step up...definitely better defensively against Rondo, but Billups' presence as a floor leader might be missed

- EJ: "(D'Antoni) says if it comes to it, they'll continue going to Carmelo"

Charles: "That's why they're gonna have a new coach next year"

EJ: "Well statistically he's the best closer in the NBA over the past decade..."

Charles: (interrupting, looking puzzled) "....is Kobe Bryant dead?"

- A Knicks fan walk smiliing into the Garden with a #3 jersey. I've got 3:1 on Starks, 5:1 on Williams, and 577,000:1 on Marbury

-Tipoff! Rondo sends a bounce pass to some photographers on the first possession.

- Landry Fields bricks two free throws as Steve Kerr notes that he's fallen out of his flow since Anthony's arrival. Coincidence?

- The Knicks are attacking the rim early; JO's holding it down. Donuts still at 10:30

- Fields nets the first goal; oddly enough a fast break layup off a beautiful outlet from Anthony

- Pierce gets mugged under hoop, loses the ball, which falls to JO, who gets swatted by 'Melo; lotta contention early....until Rondo severs through the Knicks' D for 2 easy transition layups

- An open Ray Allen floater from the elbow; might be the safest 2 points in this game...As I type that, Rondo slices his way to another uncontested layup

- Douglas abuses Rondo, but Pierce gets his back with a huge rejection, setting up Rajon on the break. Next play, he gets Douglas back, sending him to the bench with foul #2, and although Rondo at the line's a worst-case scenario, he's a monster right now

- Rondo beats the Knicks back on D for an open layup off the outlet. I think I'm getting delirious and rewind the DVR to double-check. OK, that actually just happened again.

- 3 commercial breaks in; I've yet to see the talking ball or time-travel home video ads. This is awesome news, let's see how long we can keep it up...

- Back to the game; Knicks have Bill Walker on Rondo now, who immediately gets beat for another layup. Boston steals the ball and gives the guy a much needed rest. Enter: Lebron James' quasi-stepfather.

- Glen Davis takes a shot in the face from Melo; you'd think he'd be watching that sort of thing after the last game...

- Still clear on the Unbearable Commercial Watch; also no Craig Sager sightings yet, which is somewhat disheartening; David Aldridge is like 1/250th as hilarious

- Anthony Carter hits an open look...wait a fucking second, Anthony Carter's still in the NBA?...and I thought Shaq was due for the glue factory...

- Melo abuses a double team with the shot clock winding down, banks an and-one from a very tough baseline angle, and gets a two-for-one. Not shabby.

- New York closes the quarter on an 8-0 run, but still trails Rajon Rondo 23-21

- *sigh*....Finally, we get a Talking Ball ad. I don't know if I'm thankful for going a quarter without it or just more annoyed by the delayed inevitable. What I do know is that if you gave me 30 seconds and a hit of salvia, I could come up with a better playoff ad campaign.

- Jeff Green finally gets some burn. I wonder if Danny Ainge ever wondered in the 5 minutes between drafting Green and trading him for Ray Allen: "In 4 years, I'm going to get this guy back for my 5th-best player, and it's going to make my team indisputably worse".

- Rondo's back in the game, going to-to-coast and drawing the harm. Given the way the rest of his team's shot so far in this series it's hard to blame him for not passing.

- Unbearable Commercial Watch: we've still been spared the time-travel ads, which although higher-concept and what some would call poignant, are infinitely stupider, and surprisingly crappily edited. Nobody relates NBA excitement to some crazy old man creeping out a high school kid.

- Jeff Green cleans up an ugly Pierce brick amid 3 blue jerseys; maybe I shouldn't be so hard on him; knotted at 28 with 8 to go...Green promptly picks up his third foul and forces JO to remove himself from his sideline ice chamber (drawing a delay-of-game after 4 minutes) and re-enter. Seriously, he looks like Dr. Freeze.

- Garnett nails a long jumper to bring Boston within one after a long 3 from Melo. The cameras shift to him on the ensuing timeout; on cue he begins screaming and flailing his arms. I love his intensity, but I can't help but be reminded of those corny shows where people fight meter maids.

- 6 Breaks in: still no time-travel, only one talking ball. #Winning

- New York's just murdering the glass; 20-6 over the last 10 minutes after a Stoudemire tip-in

- Rondo gets another layup; Boston leads the fast-break scoring 16-2

- The Knicks get another second chance but can't convert, and trail 38-37 because they're pulling a very convincing Butler Bulldogs impersonation this quarter

- Another talking ball; at least this one isn't a shitty comedian with a crush on Dwight Howard.

- Wide-open layup for Big Baby; I'd love to see Boston's shot chart. If I was Mike D'Antoni my entire halftime speech would consist of showing that diagram with the hoop completely covered by green dots, followed by ours with a bunch of mid-range red dots. And stand there silently.

- Injury update: Amar'e on ice? @KnicksBasketball#FYL

- Despite this unsettling development, Melo's come out huge and led NY to a 45-44 lead at the half with 16/10/4. Rondo's pacing Boston with 18/3/3, but the rest of their team seems out rhythm offensively. The Knicks almost seem to unintentionally making Rondo scorer by default; bodying up everyone else like the Spurs did to Steve Nash in the semis a few years ago and making it harder for him to create. He scored 40-something. In a loss.

- Interesting fact: Charles Barkley does not have a "Round Mound of Rebound", "I'm Not a Role Model", or any other tattoo. Even when school ends, the education continues.

- Amar'e's (man that looks awkward) back spasms are being treated, Knicks trainers are "optimistic" he'll return. No shit.

- Melo's consequently got the green light to start the 3rd. NY wastes his first jumper on a D3.

- Rony Turiaf steps out of bounds trying to save an airball. I've seen some animated gestures from refs, but I've never seen one Harlem Shake along the baseline.

- The Knicks continue to allow Ray Allen to shoot uncontested 17-footers for some reason

- Melo tries a "F*** you, I'm scoring" iso-jumper over Rondo, who gets the ball back and weaves into the D to find Pierce for a trey-ball. 12-3 run to start the quarter,

- Unbearable Commercial Watch: Ok, we're into the third quarter, and still no time travel ads. I'm beginning to think I might realistically get through an NBA game without seeing one of those annoying pieces of crap for the first time all year. #ReallyExcited

- Toney Douglas for 3 to beat the shot clock; he's been decent tonight, you know, aside from letting Rondo beat him like his child.

- Melo bombs another 3, but it's again wasted when Bill Walker shoves Allen under the hoop. T-bomb. Melo looks like someone at airport security just found weed in his bag.

- Stop talking about hockey during a basketball game. I know you're not Canadian, you don't get it, but you're preaching to the wrong fucking choir.

- Uh oh. Boston's moving the ball now and Jesus is looking holy (4-4) from long range. 65-61 Celts. The "optimism" regarding Amare's (I'm limiting one ' per word) back isn't helping much right now.

- Carmelo already has a playoff career high 14 rebounds already, which has come in handy...

- Flo Allen makes her token appearance; apparently she ran the Boston Marathon yesterday!! Good for her!!

- The bomb drops: Amare's not coming back. Down nine with 1:28 in the third. You need to win: Dig deep.

- The Knicks respond by getting stripped on the baseline; Pierce buries a contested turnaround: Dig deeper. side note: Paul Pierce might be the best set shooter since Hal Greer. Kevin Love gets more elevation on his J.

- Melo draws a cheap foul to get to the line and bring NY within 7; 3-4 inches on a 60-foot heave from Walker would've made it 4, but they're still alive heading into the 4th.

- "Sooner or later, we're gonna end up behind bars...But not todayyy (or for another 1-2 subpar sequels)" - Vin Diesel

- Melo stays in Beast Mode, grabbing his 17th board for an and-one putback. #RedeemingYourGame1

- Pierce buries another J to keep Boston up 6, but Melo keeps attacking, drawing the foul for his 10th & 11th free throws, then gets another transition bucket off a KG miss....Soon after he picks up his fourth foul: Kerr "I think at this point, you've gotta leave him out there". You think?

- Me: I haven't seen a time travel ad yet, I'm really happy about it

Roommate: I think they're gradually replacing them with those talking ball ads

Me: (belatedly coming to this realization) I can live with that.

Here's a good one: an hour of watching those ads on repeat, or an hour of sober sex with the most unattractive person you've ever drunkenly hooked up with (and yes, she's staying, and making you cook breakfast). I'd take the sex in a second, and I've made some poor choices in life.

- The Celts swarm Melo; he leads a beauty down the lane to a wide open Turiaf. Melo's hit some difficult shots, but creating offense for Rony Turiaf, that's truly impressive.

- ok, Carmelo Anthony is just in the fucking zone right now. 78-76 Knicks.

- 2nd chance points haunt the Celts again; Pretty Toney nails a 3 to give New York a one point lead. #LosingYourReligion

- Rajon Rondo has 12 fields goals; all of them in the paint. If his team were beating a 6-seed without 2 of their best 3 players right now, I'd call that damn impressive.

- Rondo, on cue, hits a jumper from the top of the key to put Boston up 2. He now has 30; a new playoff career high.

- We get our signature KG hustle play, diving on the floor for a jump ball like he was 10 years younger...too bad the possession results in a Rondo 3 attempt.

- The shot clock's winding down! Nobody's open! Never fear, Carmelo Anthony's here! He's got 42, and all the respect he might've lost from media haters after Game 1. Knicks up 91-88

- After Pierce hits two at the line, the teams trade duds for a few plays until KG gets the feed for a momentous, lead-taking dunk.

- Mikey D takes a timeout, and rightfully so, his last two possessions resulted in shots that were uglier than the girl I'd make myself bang to avoid watching the time travel ads.

- Jared Jeffries (!!!) to the rim, Knicks back up by 1

- KG puts Jeffries in his place, isolating him on the low block and hitting an icy hook.

- New York with the ball, down one. I wonder where the ball's going?

- The Knicks run a nice play to draw Melo's double away from the hoop, but a combination of KG's brilliant defense and Jeffries having no hands leads to a turnover, a timeout, and after they inexplicably allow the Celts to dribble down the clock, the end of the game.

Marv calls the loss "disheartening". Melo looks understandably deflated. What he did tonight was almost transcendent; he kept his team alive in a game they had no business winning with a stunning offensive assault. The Knicks must regroup and hope their injured stars can heal in time for them to shine at the Garden. The Celts escaped another close one: they lead 2-0 but by the slimmest of margins. They'd be wise to stay alert and work on the glass; it almost cost them a game that would've been humbling to lose.

Recognize: The All-Decade Team

So the first decade of this new millennium's almost in the books. In a couple weeks we'll be ringing in not only a new year but a new era of sorts; history tends to divide decades; identifying each by the trends that defined them. The 2000's were plagued by constraint and censorship as the NBA weathered a pair of economic meltdowns, a referee gambling debacle, and increasing tension with the Players' Union. Ten years ago we would've laughed at the notion of a league-wide dress code, welcomed a brave high-schooler into the League and assumed the Malice at the Palace had something to do with Bill Laimbeer. But there was plenty more we didn't know. We had no idea who Lebron James was, that MJ had a third run in him, or the critical importance Eagle, Colorado would come to play in Kobe's Bryant's life. We hadn't seen the Lakers' heroics, the Spurs' monotony or most of Vince Carter's Greatest Hits. Yao Ming was an indie flick at some foreign film festival, the proper spelling was DwaYne, and 'Impossible is Nothing' was a cynical thought buried deep in Kevin Garnett's subconscious. Yup, the NBA's a different place; we've seen the game go global and its players are showcasing their awesome talent on an ever-expanding audience. Which is the one of the few things that's remained about the League, and always will: the sheer brilliance of basketball's elite. So before we jump into a new decade and the change it'll bring, here's a toast to the guys who really did it proper over the past ten years; the All-Decade Team.

STARTERS
Point Guard - Steve Nash, Dallas Mavericks/Phoenix Suns
Among the many other things we didn't see coming back in 2000 was a skinny, 6-foot, soccer playing white guy from Canada winning two MVPs. Nash was the medium through which Mike D'Antoni ushered in his 7 Seconds or Less brand of entertaining basketball, and he revolutionized the one spot. His unique passing ability and lethal shooting were ideal for an offense that thrived on fast-breaking, pick and rolls and habitually itchy trigger fingers. While his defense was never World-class (or even NBA-class in some minds), his impact on the high-octane Dallas and Phoenix squads he manned this decade was undeniable, and gives him the starting nod by a hair over Jason Kidd.

Shooting Guard - Kobe Bryant, Los Angeles Lakers
Arguably the most impressive individual in the League over the past ten years, we watched Bryant struggle with superstardom the most, but also win regular season and Finals MVP awards, annual All-Star, All-Defense and All-NBA recognition, not to mention four rings. Along the way, he re-wrote scoring records, truly meriting those inevitable and inescapable Jordan comparisons he faced for years. The 45+ streak. The 81. The countless hearts he shattered at the buzzer against all odds, over and over. Much tumult bruised his early career, but Bryant's finally found what he was looking for; he's the man on the best team in the League, and that he's ever played on. Believe his legacy won't end with this decade.

Small Forward - Lebron James, Cleveland Cavaliers

Even before he arrived on the scene, James was the man. The hype surrounding this kid was unfathomable, but despite Rider-high expectations, he managed to exceed them time after time. At a point where most high-school draftees are still gathering dust on benches, Bron was dragging Tayshaun-thin Cavs squads to deep playoff runs and making 28/7/7 seem mundane. The sad reality is that there's little he'll be able to impress us in the regular season at this point; once his playoff heroics are aptly complemented by the guys around him, he'll take his place among the game's All-Time greats. While we're just Witnessing the cusp of his greatness, what he's accomplished so far makes him a no-brainer for this spot.

Power Forward - Tim Duncan, San Antonio Spurs
Timmy D's always walked softly -never the loudest or flashiest guy around- but carries a rather large proverbial stick; over the past ten years he's established himself as the greatest power forward in the game's history. His methodical dominance was a walking embodiment of James Naismith's vision; a game so textbook, so flawless, that age, injury and countless lineup changes haven't phased his brilliance. Three of four titles, two MVPs, All-Everything All-Day. Even if he bored us all through the 2000's, he's in a class by himself.

Center- Shaquille O'Neal, Los Angeles Lakers/Miami Heat (...Phoenix Suns/Cleveland Cavaliers) In a decade that seriously contrasted the 90s' big-man dominance (making All-Stars out of Dale and Antonio Davis, Jamaal Magliore and Zydrunas Ilgauskas) Diesel's credentials easily stand out as the best among centers. Although he's spent most of the past few years buried in indifference and calories, the early 2000's Shaq was a force the League hasn't and likely won't see the likes of for some time. He re-defined unguardable, leading LA to a three-peat while feuding with Kobe and enduring a barrage of Hack-a-Shaq; basketball's version of the below-the-belt-blow. Though he was never a prolific foul shooter, O'Neal was a dominant scorer, rebounder and shot-blocker and severely underrated passer who imposed upon the post like none before.

BENCH
Dwyane Wade, Miami Heat

Flash has managed to match Lebron's lofty career arc almost step for step, putting up retarded numbers year after year, and hauling Miami on his back for an unlikely title run in 2006.

Jason Kidd, New Jersey Nets/Phoenix Suns/Dallas Mavericks

The best all-around point guard of our era, Kidd nearly copped a couple MVPs and led the Nets to two Finals appearances. His jumper and defense were scrutinized, but Kidd spent years as the L's most coveted quarterback.

Allen Iverson, Philadelphia 76ers/Denver Nuggets/Memphis Grizzlies?

While his teams struggled to complement him with functional surroundings, Iverson was an unstoppable scorer and pesky defender who dragged Philly to the Finals in his MVP '01 season, but stands as the player who's accomplished the least team success on this squad.

Kevin Garnett, Minnesota Timberwolves/Boston Celtics
KG's dominant all-around game through years of mediocrity in Minnesota cemented him a spot on this team long before his arrival in Boston finally brought a title and the completion of a Hall of Fame legacy.

Paul Pierce, Boston Celtics
Pierce spent years as a criminally underrated star in Boston; much like Garnett in Minny he was surrounded by talent that betrayed his champion potential, until the two joined forces and brought a 17th title to Beantown.

Dirk Nowitzki, Dallas Mavericks

As much as I hate conceding it, Dirk has to be here. He brought a new and often-imitated dimension to a 7-footer's game, winning and MVP* and leading the Mavs deep into the playoffs more often than not.

Ben Wallace, Detroit Pistons (I'm ignoring the rest)

Although devoid of any offensive skill, Big Ben was the scariest mother-fucker and best defender in the League for the first half of the decade. His years as a bathtub plug in Chicago and Cleveland aside, he's a marginal choice over a dude who can hardly play 50 games a year.

All-Snub Team: Chauncey Billups, Vince Carter, Carmelo Anthony, Chris Webber, Yao Ming

End of an Odyssey

Well it's finally over. After numerous on-court outbursts, media-chanelled arguments, fines, suspensions, banishings and fatalities, the New York Knicks have reached a buyout agreement with Stephon Marbury, ending one of the most bitter relationships in sports. Although all us hoop heads have been kept thoroughly entertained these past few seasons by the ongoing beef between Starbury and his wayward employers, the whole saga was getting kind of stale. What began as arguments with coaching staff over philosophical differences escalated to public fallouts with teammates, an eventual dismissal from the lineup and painful buyout negotiations. Things always appeared to have hit rock bottom, only to have things grow more sour. It was amusing but at the same time depressing; here was Coney Island's savoir, a guy who used to be one of the best PGs in the League, returning to his hometown only to run his career into a brick wall and waste away his talent in designer threads on New York's bench. His own stubborn insistence on being bought out at 100% made it difficult for the Knicks to part with him, keeping a maligned, but insanely talented player off the court.

Whether he got paid in full or not, Marbury has agreed to part ways with the Knicks just days before the March 1st deadline that will allow him to sign with another team for the postseason. The talk around the league from sources close to both parties is that his signing with the Boston Celtics is imminent, which will re-unite the Showbiz and KG duo that seemed destined to rule the West in the late 90's. You know how the rest went. Apparently, Minny wasn't big enough for the two young stars and Marbury demanded a move closer to home. He arrived in New Jersey where he established himself as an All-League talent but began a steady descent into mediocrity and beyond, his teams always underachieved, his abilities as a leader were doubted. His slide culminated in the New York disaster, which may have crippled his career beyond repair. Who knows if he's even the same player that put up mediocre numbers on a shitty team a few years ago.

You all know how Garnett's story goes too; spent years trying to drag the Wolves out of the first round, becoming one of the league's most endearing and revered players (no to mention one of its best), before finally being dealt to a competitive team and gripping the Larry O as soon as it was within reach. His apparently imminent reunion with Marbury would bring full circle a duo that has gone in perfectly contrasting directions since splitting up, and bring Stephon into an environment unlike any he's experienced. Here he'll be asked to do for the team and not for self; play 5-man basketball, put his body on the line and get stats out of mind, concepts which hopefully are not beyond his grasp after numerous dysfunctions and dismissals have marred his career.

...and so Stephon finds himself back under Garnett's shadow, desperately seeking to contribute to a title defense. Hopefully by now he understands the point that he's had to learn harder than Kobe, T-Mac and Vince: being the man comes with a price. Marbury paid with laboring through the prime of his career in the Lottery, and more recently in a basketball-less abyss. Hopefully he's taken a page from KG's book, better yet read the whole thing a few times and adopted his philosophy because if Starbury's anywhere near the player he used to be he could mean the World to th Celtics...then again if he's the person he used to be he could seriously fuck things up.