Time Capsule 2017

Back in 2014, I did a piece called the Time Capsule, condensing the NBA season into its most significant or generally awesome moments, and tossing artifacts that represent them in a hypothetical stash for posterity and/or space invaders.

It was one of my favorite compilations to write, touching on the great (KD's MVP season, Adam Silver's debut), the not-so-great (the Dunk Contest), the hilariously bad (Josh Smith's shot selection), and the ominous (Cleveland lucking out a 1.7% chance at the #1 pick, which they would soon flip for Kevin Love).

So after an inexplicable two-year hiatus, the Time Capsule makes its triumphant return for 2017; the things to truly remember from this NBA season:

- Box Scores from Russell Westbrook's 42 Triple-Doubles
The notion of a player actually averaging a triple-double for an entire season seemed too outlandish in today's NBA. Sure, Oscar Robertson was able to do it 55 years ago, but in a vastly different league. Not only were defenses archaic, but opposition painfully less athletic. The whole league also played like it was on meth: the average team possessions per game was 96.4 this season, vs. 126.2 in 1962.

No longer facing complaints about passing to Kevin Durant, Westbrook took it upon himself to generate new complaints about passing to anyone at all. Along the way, his incessant stat-hoarding buoyed one of the NBA's shallowest rosters to a playoff spot, and just might, if narratives are any indication (and they definitely are), win him the MVP.

Whether you applaud or abhor his style, Westbrook made history this year, his compelling chase adding season-long excitement and awe.

- Sam Hinkie's Resignation Letter
Although over a year old, Hinkie's legendary farewell opus to #TheProcess resonated deeply this season, albeit posthumously.

The Sixers made strides as an organization for the first time in four years, and have nabbed in Joel Embiid - if good health prevails - exactly the franchise player Hinkie pined for. Next year they'll add Ben Simmons and the third pick in a loaded draft to their core.

It was a painful couple of years for Philly fans, but in a league where so few teams have reason to be hopeful, Hinkie martyred himself for their current salvation. Enjoy Bryan Colangelo.

- Mike D'Antoni's Razor & James Harden's Beard Trimmer
Sans his legendary mustache, Mike D'Antoni joined forces with another form of famous facial hair to spawn the surprise of the NBA season. Many felt that Steve Nash could never be topped as a D'Antoni muse, but James Harden swiftly curbed popular opinion.

While The Beard's confusing disappearing act/quaalude trip in the season's deciding game looms ominously, Houston spent several months as the talk of the NBA, mostly because of these guys.

- Adrian Wojnarowski`s ESPN Contract

- Game-Worn Shoes From Devin Booker`s 70-Point Outing

- One-Way Plane Ticket, New York to Chicago, Dated Jan 9 2017
In one of recent memory's most mystifying incidents, Derrick Rose just up and bounced from the Knicks one day, and didn't bother to really tell anyone. This became problematic for New York when they showed up to that night's game both without a starting point guard, and an explanation as to why. Obviously this could only happen to the Knicks.

Rose returned the next day, but his bizarre bail job was one of the many usual sideshows marring what was already an appalling basketball season in NYC.

- Bust of Phil Jackson with his Foot Firmly Inserted in his Mouth
It was a tough year for Phil. Not only did he face the stern reality that his basketball team still sucks, but made more verbal mis-steps than anyone not named LaVar Ball.

Building a strong case as an increasingly senile jackass, Jackson dropped tomes ranging from counter-productive to outright inappropriate, with an arrogance not befitting of his current circumstance.

- Charles Oakley's Tickets to Feb 8 Clippers @ Knicks Game
But yet still, the lowest point of the Knicks' season came when a petty beef between their childish owner and a former player - one who is revered by New York City and the NBA community - led to Oakley being mobbed by security, dragged out of MSG, and arrested.

Legions of fans, and players both past and present came out in defense of Oak, while James Dolan's ownership tenure grew another ugly, if not predictable stain.

- Giannis Antetokounmpo Jersey with Last Name Removed 
Before half the league knew how to spell or pronounce this kid's last name, he strode to the level of a one-name star. It's now just "Giannis", get used to hearing it.

- Potato Parcels

- Cupcakes

- One of Craig Sager's Suits 
The most touching part of this season stemmed from a sideline mainstay losing his battle with leukemia. Sager's passing was undeniably tragic, but the outpouring of support from all over the league - throughout his courageous fight and after its end, including an awesome All-Star Weekend contest - was an uplifting tribute to a man of amazing spirit (and questionable fashion). #SagerStrong.

- Zach LaVine and Jabari Parker's ACLs

- Detailed Map of Waiters Island

- Funeral Attire
Back in January, shit popped off between John Wall and Jae Crowder, resulting in an on-court fracas, locker room lockdown, and $40k worth of fines, as well as (directly) the NBA's best new rivalry and (indirectly) the best series of the playoffs.

The Wizards donned all black for their next Celtics meeting, but while winning that game, were ultimately the ones buried in a seven-game bout that stood out for its dramatic swings and pure visceral hatred between these up-and-coming East foes. Word to Kelly Olynyk.

- Stopwatch Frozen at 1 minute, 30 seconds
Because that's how long Klay Thompson held the ball - in 29 minutes of floor time - while dropping 60 on the Pacers. And that's completely fucking incredible.

- Psychiatric Evaluation Report of Vivek Ranadive
It's hard to tell what was more insane: trading DeMarcus Cousins for Buddy Hield (and a pick, whatever), or then claiming Hield has "Steph Curry potential". Dude's got some interesting stuff going on upstairs.

- This Sweater:


- This T-Shirt:



- This Photographer Vest: 


- Isaiah Thomas' Lateral Incisor
A heroic All-NBA season by the 5'9" Thomas was upended when his sister was tragically killed in a car crash mere days before the start of the playoffs. A distasteful debate thus raged across the court of public opinion; every talking head with a soapbox opining as to whether he should play.

Thomas chose to not only play, but to do so loudly enough to silence all of them. After Otto Potter went all Wolf Stansson on him, IT hung 53 points on the Wizards - most in a playoff game in 14 years - on what would have been his sister's 23rd birthday.

- Velociraptor Fossil
Because the asteroid that murked out the dinosaurs struck Toronto in the form of LeBron James.

- An X-Ray of Blake Griffin's Foot

- Jimmy Buss' Baseball Cap

- Chandler Parsons' Contract
"Chancun" looks like a decent gig for a $22 million salary. Speaking of which;

- This Tweet:


- And This One:



- Larry Nance's Crowning of Brook Lopez (and Timofey Mozgov's Reaction)

Among many memorable dunks this season, perhaps none was more vicious than Larry Nance Jr. putting the hapless Brook Lopez underneath the Jordan logo. As if enough bad things hadn't happened to the Nets already.  

Almost as incredible was Timofey Mozgov, who ran away like he'd just witnessed the Independence Day aliens attack or something. It was Mozgov's single most important contribution to the NBA season; slightly steep at $15 million, but at least it was more than Parsons brought to the table.                                                                        

- Tim Duncan's Retired Jersey

- A Pair of Big Baller ZO2s

- The MVP Ballots
This season`s MVP race was an exercise in futility; an attempt to separate the exploits of four players who put up historic campaigns that made this award a total skeet-shoot. Their virtues have been extolled at length, and while Russell Westbrook appears to be the favorite after his late-season push, the trophy going to any of he, Harden, LeBron, or Kawhi Leonard would be an acceptable outcome.

- Gregg Popovich's Pachulia Rant 

- The Skates Steph Curry Lent Rudy Gobert 

- TempurPedic Matress
Resting stars was never more of a hot-button issue than during this year's slog through the 82-game regular season. What was once a Pop Special became adopted league-wide, as coaches sat stars out for a litany of reasons ranging from injury prevention to preservation for the playoffs.

Obviously this drew the ire of league and media alike, especially when "rest games" coincided with the televised contests the NBA was recently paid so much money for. Fans both in the stands and at home were selectively deprived of the game's biggest names, a particular affront to those who'd purchased tickets in advance, expecting LeBron and instead getting Richard Jefferson.

There may not be a clear solution at present, so we can count on this dilemma persisting until a compromise is struck between burnt-out players and fed-up fans.

- This Instagram Post:

- And This One:



- Captain Obvious' Uniform
Hotels.com's wise-cracking spokesman is a pretty accurate embodiment of this season's outcome; one that anybody who wasn't braindead or woefully naive saw coming the second Kevin Durant dropped his Player's Tribune announcement.

The inevitability of a Cavs-Warriors Finals was unfadeable, and Golden State confirmed what many suspected in easily dispatching of LeBron & Co. While Once-King James is sent back to the drawing board, and masses of other teams bide their time, the Warriors seem very much an insurmountable force for the near future.

- Kevin Durant's Finals MVP Trophy
But above all, this should be remembered as Durant's year. For better or worse, he drove the NBA's major plotline this season (as well as many minor ones), and ultimately stood its greatest victor. Adding a championship to his Hall of Fame resume punctuated a dominant Finals, and a season where he made himself the alpha male of arguably the greatest team ever.

While his critics can still harp about the means to his end, the deed has been done. Durant's a champion, and doesn't appear ready to stop with just one. In a league where superstars are measured largely on their ability to win, he's put himself in a historic limelight. If there's one image that will linger and endure from this season, bet on this being it:

Playoff Hot Takes!

As we meander towards what looks like an increasingly inevitable Warriors-Cavs rubber match, the playoffs have been developing somewhat predictably:

- The Jazz pulled off the only first-round upset
- Russell Westbrook Westbrook'd himself out in the first round
- The Raptors are playing inconsistently
- Gregg Popovich is the adjustment master
- The Celtics and Wizards might kill each other before the series is decided
- Rob Hennigan got fired
- As expected, a team looks unbeatable in each conference

Despite its seemingly predestined result, there are still a few noteworthy things developing in these playoffs - a few random thoughts:

The Clippers Are Cursed

It just seems unfair at this point.

Years upon years of trash basketball; the franchise run in reprehensible manner by a notorious bigot. When they drafted a franchise guy in Blake Griffin, and were gifted Chris Paul (I use that term literally), there was finally reason to hope for this team. A few years later they ousted Donald Sterling and brought in a coach with a championship pedigree; the pieces were falling into place.

Little did the Clippers know, they were just setting themselves up for disappointment in larger moments. The franchise is still yet to make its first West Finals, pulling an incomprehensible meltdown the one time they seemed headed there. A combination of injuries and indifference have betrayed them annually, not to mention that GM Doc Rivers is nowhere near the same level as Coach Doc Rivers.

LAC heads into what is likely the most crucial offseason in the NBA. The writing seems to be on the wall in bold font that this roster core has run its course. Not only is their own fate in serious flux, but the potential repercussions - a departure of Paul, Griffin or JJ Redick - could alter the league's power balance, perhaps significantly.

So Is This Jazz Team
Not that they were beating the Warriors anyway, but was it too much for Utah to ask that they gauge their playoff ceiling at full strength? Obviously yes. After another injury-riddled regular season, they lost both Rudy Gobert and Gordon Hayward briefly in the first round, and now George Hill against Golden State.

If Hayward bolts this summer (something that very well could happen), we'll be forced to wonder if this team's accomplishments at anywhere near normal health would've been too much to walk away from.

Only Playoff Rondo Can Stop Playoff Rondo
Raise your hand if, at any point in the past three years, you thought that Rajon Rondo's absence could swing a playoff series.

It's no coincidence that the Bulls nosedove as soon as he broke his thumb, unable to soul-read Brad Stevens any longer. After a regular season that bordered on absurdity at times, Chicago is left with a very big playoff "What If", potentially joining a small handful of teams to pull off the 8 vs 1 upset.

Of course Rondo's injury perhaps has given way to other greatness:

Isaiah Thomas is a Superhero
There's really no other way to describe the guy. First off, he's 5-foot-fucking-9, a half-inch shorter than the average american male. Being that small and challenging the World's tallest athletes as unfettered as he does is heroic in its own right.

But more to the point, the guy transcended an unspeakable personal tragedy, got his mouth demolished, and then dropped a historic game that stands out among Boston's historic array of historic games.

While he mourned, a sad number of people inappropriately critiqued his decision to play; to stick by a team that would surely be burnt toast without him. His response has been pure 🔥🔥🔥.

Dwane Casey's Glue Factory Grade
I've been of the not-so-small school for Casey's replacement since the Wizards full-palm slapped Toronto in 2015's first round. Since then, he's oscillated between Coach of the Year contender and thin-ice scrutiny magnet, seemingly doing just enough to not get himself fired.

Yes, the Raptors made the Eastern Conference Finals last year, but they really didn't win two series insofar as Indiana and Miami respectively, lost them. Their odds of returning there seem close to nil after Cleveland drop-kicked them in two straight games; Casey bringing panicked rotations and a seemingly unprepared team.

Casey is what he is: a good regular season coach. Toronto has proven themselves a good regular season team. If they're going to topple LeBron anytime soon - difficult as that may currently seem - they'll need someone else putting the pieces in play. The Raptors just too often seem to be performing below the sum of their parts. They have a good roster with a variety of looks, but Casey isn't great with lineups, or consistently getting the best from his guys - two playoff must-haves.

Kyle Lowry and Demar DeRozan seemingly never play well in the same playoff game. Patrick Patterson is misused. In a league where teams like Golden State, Houston and *cough* Cleveland are succeeding by spacing the floor and moving the ball, the Raptors ran a clogged offensive set and ranked dead last in assists per game this year.

It took the entire internet telling Casey to play Norman Powell against Milkwaukee for him to do so. It marked not only the turning point of that series, but the first time Casey hadn't been outcoached by his opponent in the playoffs. He promptly returned Powell to the bench vs Cleveland, and the same process occurred.

It won't be enough this time, a fitting metaphor for his time on Toronto's bench.

The Switch Has Flipped
Despite Casey's flaws as a coach, it's slightly unfair when you're pitted against a team dropping 119 ppg, while shooting 50% from beyond the arc.

Even through their defensive meltdown over the past few months, it seemed mostly as a "when" not "if" matter that the Cavs would channel a higher level and begin completely bushwhacking their way through the East. After a disconcerting Indiana series that easily could've gone six games, they've made the Raptors look like the Toon Squad's first half vs. the Monstars.

Small sample size be damned, the Cavs look like they've snapped out of it.


RIP GNG
As a Grizzlies fan, watching the first round was painfully bittersweet. 

The Spurs had swept Memphis in both of their last two playoff meetings; this one seemed destined for a third when Grindfather Tony Allen went down. But after "Take That For Data" went viral, Memphis put up the gulliest of fights, taking two from the Spurs, including an overtime thriller in what was likely Kawhi Leonard's best game ever. 

At the same time, it was merely a spirited final effort from a dying beast. The rugged, physical, underdogging Grit N Grind era that defined the Grizzlies through their rise to NBA prominence (endearing them deeply to the blue-collar city of Memphis) is dying out. Fiz Markee throwing Zach Randolph back into the starting lineup for one last run was a fitting touch. 

The truth is Memphis is too old, too unathletic, too shallow, and can't shoot well enough. They have holes fill, but they're financially strained after lighting $94 million on fire in giving it to Chandler Parsons. They'd ideally have younger, cheaper players waiting in the wings, but it's unclear if any of their prospects beyond JaMychal Green and perhaps James Ennis are ready for bigger roles. 

Roster changes seem almost imminent, and whether the tweaks are minor or major, they seem likely to be a shift away from Grit N Grind as the Grizzlies try and survive a changing climate. So a toast to GNG, it was a fun ride. 

Banter's 2017 NBA All-Star Starters

I usually spend this opening paragraph rattling off some semi-cliché rant about the bastardization of the All-Star selection process, tainted by the competency of the average voter (which seems to be a common issue these days).

But just as the situation reached peak popularity contest and Zaza Fucking Pachulia was about to start in an actual NBA All-Star Game, the Adam Silver Innovation Wave washed over, giving me slightly less to worry about.

Half of the voting is now comprised of ballots from the media and players, who while capable of dubiousness themselves, are generally far more sane and educated than NBA Fan X. This adjustment may just push us past the days of the Yao Ming Exception, much like the elimination of the center position on the ballot delivered us from Jamal Magloire.

The system still isn't perfect - a guy averaging a triple-double apparently isn't starter-worthy - but it's absolutely a step in the right direction. A title that will eventually help shape a player's legacy (and in some cases be used as a Hall of Fame yardstick) deserves as much respect.

With the voting in safer hands, the competition for All-Star spots has fallen into a predictable pattern this year; a facile cakewalk in the East and an absolute bloodbath out West. Who's shone brightest so far? Here are the most deserving participants, beginning with the Starters:

EAST STARTERS

G - KYLE LOWRY, TORONTO RAPTORS
Even though the Celtics are only just now finding healthy legs, the Raptors have held

court as the East's 2nd-best team, led by Lowry's sublimely efficient scoring/playmaking, and bulldog defense. Scoring a career-high 22ppg on a completely incredulous .589 eFG% (ninth in the NBA and tops among all guards), Lowry's a staple in all of the Raptors' best lineups, leading a historically-great offense. His dominance is so consistent that one of the NBA's deadliest lineups this year - simply called "Lowry + Bench", features him and four Raptors reserves.

Some misled pundits and fans have attributed Toronto's offensive ascent to Demar DeRozan's scoring spree, slotting him as a backcourt starter. But both the eye test and RPM (where Lowry sits second league-wide, to DeRozan's 114th) suggest Lowry's all-around superiority, and true vitality in the Raptors' success.


G - ISAIAH THOMAS, BOSTON CELTICS
Lowry isn't the only East guard on a torrid offensive streak. Thomas is currently dropping 28.7ppg on .537 eFG%, which is great for any guard, and outright absurd for one who's 5'9". Thomas has become a fearless neo-Iverson, only smaller and more efficient. His whirlwind attacks of the hoop keep defenses constantly guessing, and powered the Celtics through a slew of early key injuries.

Thomas may be a bit of a one-way player, but it's tough to blame a guy for defensive shortcomings (get it) when any player he faces can easily outreach or shoot over him. I'd prefer to focus on his league-leading fourth-quarter scoring, on a team currently ranked fifth in close-game win %. Thomas is a flat-out killer.

While John Wall's been sublime this season, the Wizards started off pitifully, and only recently broke the .500 barrier. Thomas has led a better, injury-hampered team all season, giving him the edge in a close race.

F - JIMMY BUTLER, CHICAGO BULLS

Things are kind of going to shit in Chicago, now that their early 3-point charade has been exposed, and the Rajon Rondo Experience has hit worst-case-scenario. While the Bulls franchise implodes around him, Butler's been his ever-stellar self; a top-tier player on both sides of the ball with an underrated killer instinct.

Despite ball-stopping and lane clogging from Wade and (before his benching) Rondo, Butler's boosted his scoring by 19% to a career-high 24.8, getting to the line far more (9.7 FTA vs 7.1 last year) and hitting a career-best .866 while there. He's also posted a noticeable career-best in rebounds, while matching his best assist numbers, doing so with peak efficiency - his 25.9 PER is good for 10th overall.

The Bulls owe Butler a great debt for being anywhere near the playoffs right now (he's third in the league in win shares; mildly anomalous on a sub-.500 team). With justice it will come in the form of better surroundings, whether in Chicago or elsewhere.

F - LEBRON JAMES, CLEVELAND CAVALIERS

LeBron's write-up for an East starting spot might be the most trite, useless words I wrangle together on a yearly basis. You know why he's here, and that he has to be, and that him starting in this game has become as much an annual certainty as taxes, Christmas, and DeMarcus Cousins trade rumors.

But just so he's not taken completely for granted, let the record show Bron has resurrected his 3-point shot (.375 on 4.8 attempts vs .309 on 3.7 last year), while tying his career high rebs+assts in his 14th season.

F - GIANNIS ANTETOKOUNMPO, MILWAUKEE BUCKS

This escalated quickly. Most of us knew to brace ourselves for more exponential improvement from the Greek Freak, but he's unleashing an extinction-level event upon the NBA. He's lifted the Bucks to improbable status as a likely playoff team, while leading them in points, rebounds, assists, blocks, steals and field goal%. If you think that's impressive, he's also threatening to be the first player to Top-20 all those categories since nobody. Ever.

We're witnessing a revolution, it is televised (if you have League Pass or live in Wisconsin), and it literally defies adjectives. Antetokounmpo does things we've never seen before, with gazelle-like grace and Stretch Armstrong-like elasticity. He's already a historically versatile force, sits 2nd in the NBA in PER, has arguably been the East's best player so far, and - here's the fun part - is 22 years old.


WEST STARTERS

G - RUSSELL WESTBROOK, OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER

There's really only so much that needs to be said here beyond "He's averaging a triple-double", but I'll entertain the explanation:

Westbrook's not only on a shocking course to contest one of sports' most untouchable records, but he's doing so as the league's leading scorer, on a team that's a mortal lock for the playoffs. Westbrook is the Thunder as they weather Kevin Durant's departure, on pace to shatter the NBA's single-season usage rate record. His offensive RPM is bested only by James Harden, while sitting fifth in overall RPM.

What he lacks in efficiency, Westbrook more than makes up for in pure omnipresence, even amid a constant defensive swarm as his team's only major threat. Bound by laws of physics and energy unfamiliar to us mere mortals, he's a thrill to watch, and a total nightmare to try and contain.

G - JAMES HARDEN, HOUSTON ROCKETS

While Harden was already essentially a point guard (and MVP candidate), his insertion into the Mike D'Antoni Stat Steroid System has produced some incredible results. The Beard is accounting for the most offense of anyone in the NBA, scoring just under 29/game while dishing a (by far) league-leading 11.7 dimes.

Pick on his defense if you will (at least he's starting to show signs), but Houston isn't about D; they're openly bad at it. They're just going to outscore you, and so far they've done it far beyond anyone's expectations, as the 3-seed out West, once projected as low-rung playoff fodder at best.

Moreyball found its apex coach, and surrounded Harden with a bounty of elite shooters - he's taken full advantage.

F - KEVIN DURANT, GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS

It takes a pretty darn good player to walk into a whirlwind offensive juggernaut like the Golden State Warriors, and firmly commandeer it from the two-time reigning MVP.

Durant has done just that, relegating Steph Curry's role with a sublime offensive display. Aside from performing his most efficient scoring masterpiece yet, Durant's elevated his D to arguable All-Defense contention, finally tapping into the disruption his length allows him to cause on that end.

The Warriors have undoubtedly had a couple hiccups; every alignment of superstars does while they feel each other out. But they're still the NBA's best team, and Durant's their best player, so he has to be here.

F - KAWHI LEONARD, SAN ANTONIO SPURS

It's sickening how consistent the Spurs are. In what's very much a transition season for them - as much as transition exists in San Antonio - they're still motoring along exactly where they should be; slightly behind Golden State and slightly ahead of everyone else.

Leonard, as expected, has taken on a greater offensive load, while posting an elite 28.35 PER (good for third overall), and providing the same peerless defense. Leonard's defensive RPM has taken a hit (down to a pedestrian .99 - by far a career-low) because he now shares the court with several minus defenders instead of Tim Duncan, but he still manages to post a top-10 6.22 RPM overall.

Leonard's come along steadily; gradually evolving each season to a new level of beast. He's the NBA's two-way zenith, and enough reason in himself for Pop to keep coaching in the AD (anno Duncan).

F - MARC GASOL, MEMPHIS GRIZZLIES
I tried my damndest to give this spot to Anthony Davis. The Brow's put up a superlative season so far, but ultimately the Pelicans just suck a little too much.

While Gasol might seem like a homer pick by a Grizzlies fan, he's got a ton working in his favor. Memphis is sixth in the West; somewhere they have absolutely no business being, given they lost Mike Conley for 12 games, have hardly seen Chandler Parsons, and sport a new coach with a rag-tag supporting cast that was wholly unproven prior to this year.

Heaps of credit have to go to Gasol; beyond his usual all-around beastery, he's extended his range on offense, giving the Grizz the spacing they need to adapt and survive in the modern NBA. He operates outside his traditional comfort zone, moonlighting as both perimeter gunner and playmaker. The ensuing space allows Zach Randolph to operate in the post undeterred, opens cutting lanes for Tony Allen, and gives Memphis' youngsters plenty of room to breathe.

He's also been a cold-hearted murderer down the stretch in a litany of close Memphis wins, coming up with huge plays on both sides of the ball, and nailing numerous game-winners. His stats don't jump off the page like Davis', but he's as well-rounded as elite centers come, and has done as much through adjustments and clutch performances to help his team as anyone in the league this year.

Stay tuned for the reserves, coming next week! 

Banter's 2015 NBA Awards

Coming to you on tape delay from a kush-shrouded computer desk in Halifax, Nova Scotia; it's the official unveiling of Basketball Banter's 2015 NBA Awards!!!

This season was admittedly a little bit of an adjustment for me and my NBA addiction; I watched noticeably less basketball this year, the least I have since getting League Pass six years ago.

I spent most of the '13-'14 season on Torn Achilles Island, so LP was my best friend. The previous three seasons, I was unemployed and playing online poker for most of my income; my nightly routine was a bunch of tournament tables on one screen, and the evening's premiere matchup on the other.

Opening and managing a restaurant proved to be slightly more constricting; I was working more than ever this season, having to cover an array of hours and get business done on-demand. Obviously this left me with a little less time to channel-surf NBA games and mindlessly rant about my observations on here. But it also taught me plenty about time management; I came on strong after the All-Star break, sorta like the Spurs only less awesome. I took in more games - whether live or replayed - getting back into a familiar zone after missing too much 'Amazing' this NBA season.

This year's playoffs are going to be something special, but before we get to those, it's time to look back on the past six months and hand out some hardware to those that showed out this season. So without further ado...

All-Rookie Teams
First: G-Elfrid Payton,G-Jordan Clarkson,F-Andrew Wiggins,F-Nikola Mirotic,C-Nerlens Noel Second: G-Zach LaVine, G-Rodney Hood, F-KJ McDaniels, F-Tarik Black, C-Jusuf Nurkic

Rookie of the Year: Andrew Wiggins

After Jabari Parker went down with an ACL tear a month into the season (sigh), Wiggins started absolutely crushing this award, looking like a unanimous choice. Since then, the gap has narrowed considerably with Mirotic, Noel and Payton all having stellar second halves. Narrowed, but not closed.

Wiggins was dominant for a first-year player. He led rookies in scoring by a mile (17ppg; the next-closest was 12), while being a very good defender, with a more well-rounded skill set than anyone gave him credit for coming out of Kansas. Unlike the other contenders here, he excelled all season long, and even though the Wolves were a disaster this season, Wiggins was often a lone bright spot. He's reason in-and-of himself for them to be optimistic about the future (and ecstatic about the Kevin Love trade).
Regards to: Nikola Mirotic, Nerlens Noel, Elfrid Payton

Coach of the Year: Mike Budenholzer

I was sincerely torn here. As recently as yesterday I was ready to give this award to Brad Stevens (who got Boston to the playoffs - albeit in the East - despite one of the NBA's least-talented rosters, a slew of injuries and his own front office's intentions to tank), but felt maybe I was just being a biiiit too much of a contrarian.

To deny Bud would be to ignore the impeccable job he's done in getting the Hawks to smash expectations on both sides of the ball with the most seamless, selfless play we've seen outside of San Antonio. The Hawks were shockingly dominant this season, playing above the sum of their parts and making believers out of every possible critic. Bud got everyone to buy into the team-first concept, milked the most out of his whole roster, and sustained excellence through the entire season.
Regards to: Brad Stevens, Steve Kerr, Jason Kidd

Sixth Man of the Year: Isaiah Thomas

Of course the one thing the Celtics' front office did to actually help this year's product was to swipe Thomas from Phoenix's backcourt meltdown at a very fair price.

In a season where nobody really stepped up to claim this award, Thomas wins sorta by default, as the 6th Man with the smallest hole(s) in his case. Jamal Crawford was predictably shitty on defense and shot under 40% from the floor. Ryan Anderson was almost as terrible on D and missed a quarter of the season. Lou Williams was grossly one-dimensional and put up his best performances in the absence of starters (both Demar DeRozan and Kyle Lowry).

Thomas meanwhile led all full-time bench players in both scoring and assists, averaging 19/5 for the Celtics to help push them towards the playoffs. He's likely never going to be a starter for a winning team, but Thomas may have found his niche already as a pocket-rocket who can carry a second unit's scoring.
Regards to: Lou Williams, Ryan Anderson, Jamal Crawford

Most Improved Player: Draymond Green

Let's be honest here: nobody saw this coming. Even though Green was a tough, dynamic bench player last year, "Draymond Green will become a borderline All-Star and one of the NBA's most versatile players this year" would've made you sound like a bonafide base-head last October.

Obviously it didn't hurt that David Lee went down to star the year, but Green came out on fire and made Lee's bench demotion a total must within two weeks. He didn't really cool off after; he was one of the NBA's better-passing forwards, he expanded his offensive game, and he was just a total menace on defense, whether chasing a stretch big on the perimeter or bodying someone in the low post. For perspective; he was paid $915,243 this year, and very well might ink a max deal this summer.

Props have to go to Jimmy Butler, who also made an eye-popping offensive improvement this year, and lost very narrowly. In the end, it was Green's leaps on both sides of the ball that sealed this in my books.
Regards to: Jimmy Butler, Rudy Gobert, Donatas Motiejunas

All-Defense Teams
First: G-Chris Paul, G-Tony Allen, F-Kawhi Leonard, F-Draymond Green, C-Rudy Gobert
Second: G-Klay Thompson, G-Jimmy Butler, F-Anthony Davis, F-Serge Ibaka, C-DeAndre Jordan
Defensive Player of the Year: Kawhi Leonard

DPOY is usually a 'big man's award', and while that isn't likely to change much with the advent of defensive metrics and every NBA pundit getting a boner for 'rim protection', this season needs to be an exception because Kawhi Leonard is just that good.

He might be a cyborg that RC Buford and Gregg Popovich secretly-developed to stop LeBron James and Kevin Durant; he's got not only the size and length but all the tools of an apex perimeter defender: long arms and freakishly huge hands, potent lateral quickness, great instincts, precise timing, and the perfect mix of zen-like calm and 'just fucking try and get by me' shoulder-chippage.

He makes what he does look effortless in same vein as a Steph Curry three or a LeBron fast break; it just seems unfair. As would giving this award to anyone else.
Regards to: Draymond Green, Anthony Davis, Rudy Gobert

All-NBA Teams
First: G-Steph Curry, G-James Harden, F-LeBron James, F-Anthony Davis, C-Boogie Cousins
Second: G-Russell Westbrook, G-Chris Paul, F-Pau Gasol, F-LaMarcus Aldridge, C-Marc Gasol
Third: G-Klay Thompson, G-Jimmy Butler, F-Paul Millsap, F-Kawhi Leonard, C-DeAndre Jordan

Most Valuable Player: James Harden

So here we are, at the NBA's most touted individual honor, which this year was a particularly painful mind-fuck of cluttered candidacy. The decision between Harden and Curry was a brutal one that could've gone either way, with three more players (Russell Westbrook, LeBron James, Anthony Davis) also putting up very MVP-worthy seasons.

For me it comes down to a question of what "value" truly means, and by most definitions, Harden was that dude this year. He aced all the major MVP tests, while lifting a team that was hit by both offseason losses and injuries to the West's 2nd seed (and yes, I'm obviously aware that the 2nd-6th seeds were basically the same thing this year). The Warriors were an absolutely dominant team, but I'm sticking with my opinion that we need to stress the "team" part; that Curry's brilliance was lubricated by those around him.

I've had this debate with tons of hoops heads whose opinions I respect over the past weeks and months, and I continue hearing the same retort: that I can't "hold Curry's teammates against him". I'm sorry guys, but especially in a race this close, I feel like a) I absolutely can, and b) that it's not so much an assessment of Curry's teammates as it is Harden's. Between a summer exodus and injuries, Houston lost 70% of its rotation this year, and still managed to be one of the best teams in what could be the toughest conference ever. And Harden basically did everything for them, including a much-improved effort on D. I don't know what more you could ask of the guy, so I won't.
Regards to: Steph Curry, Russell Westbrook, LeBron James, Anthony Davis

Now bring on the postseason.