Showing Out, Flaming Out, Coming Out - This Week in the NBA

It's been a wild week in professional basketball, certainly one occupied by what, according to Charles Barkley, was supposed to be the "worst First Round ever". Well, so much for that. While Chuck tries to dislodge his foot from his throat, let's get into it:

- The NBA was thrust into the spotlight of professional sports' greatest taboo, when longtime veteran Jason Collins announced he was gay in an interview with Sports Illustrated, becoming the first active pro athlete to publicly come out. A move that no doubt took an immense amount of courage will be greeted mostly with open arms - especially coming from a respected veteran - and will hopefully help build towards ending the type of discrimination that made this issue a big story in the first place. Maybe Chris Broussard will get the memo someday.

Collins made this historic announcement with humble confidence, and deserves to be commended for his bravery, regardless of the fact that his career is in decline. While he may not face the life of an openly gay professional athlete for long (as of today, his status as a landmark figure in the gay community currently heavily outweighs his status as a basketball player), if the step he's taken here makes it any easier for athletes who follow, or people in general, to be open about their sexuality and accepted among their peers - and it will be significant to an innumerably great measure - then Collins will make a legendary impact.

- While Collins' announcement came as a jolt of publicity to the NBA, what first looked like a predictably mundane first round has seen much of the Playoff bracket thrown in a blender during an exciting run of headline-filled basketball:

Most notably has been an ill-timed first career Russell Westbrook injury (thanks, Patrick Beverley!) and its ensuing impact on the seemingly-inevitable Finals rematch of OKC and Miami. While Kevin Durant could probably win a shoot-out with the Rockets by himself blindfolded, it remains to be seen if the Thunder can crack more evolved defenses without Westbrook's constant pressuring attack. Much has been said of his ball dominance being a leash holding KD back, and these coming weeks will be the ultimate testament to just how much of a catalyst his presence is for Durant, but regardless of any "addition by subtraction" that can be made, the Thunder just lost a player who's unquestionably among the 10 best in the NBA, and that hurts.

- Westbrook joined fellow All-Star David Lee (and Kobe, and D-Rose, blah blah blah) on the sidelines in suits, although someone forgot to tell the rest of the Golden State Warriors, who are riding a transcendent performance from Steph Curry to a 3-1 lead over a Nuggets team that's being rained on from all angles, looking as helpless as Billy Madison's primary classmates in dodgeball. Curry's deconstructing Denver like he was still playing a Davidson opponent, and doing it all on a freshly-tweaked ankle that this performance confirms is not made of papier-maché.

The Warriors have delivered an all-around inspiring performance that can't help but evoke memories of the "We Believe" odds-foe that ran over the Mavs in '07. Carl Landry has filled in for David Lee remarkably (although it isn't that remarkable given that Landry's possibly the most consistently underrated player in the NBA), Jarrett Jack has been spectacular, even Andrew Bogut is showing signs of emerging from rigor mortis. Mark Jackson's flexing his muscle as an NBA coach - especially in terms of motivating his team and having them at their best - and has George Karl's team in a void much larger than Danilo Gallinari's absence should account for.

- Also on an injury-defying course for an upset are the Chicago Bulls, after that marathon slugfest led by Nate Robinson channeling his inner Kobe Bryant and dragging his team to extra time. It evolved into a triple-overtime blockbuster that enveloped the entire first half of the following Grizzlies/Clippers game, and was finished off by the Bulls' consistent team execution after Nasty Nate fouled out. Their 3-1 lead is a testament to this team's toughness and togetherness (I refuse to use the words "Grit" or "Grind"), and Joakim Noah should stand out for his stoic response to plantar fasciitis, not only playing through terrible pain, but effectively enough to give his team an edge in a series few even thought they could win with him. He's coming up - to use an obvious pun - Big.

- After the Grizzlies lost any concept of #GNG in their dubious opening road losses to the Clippers, they re-discovered that sense of urgency that they've thrived upon but haven't felt in a while after a regular season where uncertainty and expectation awkwardly shook hands. Returning to the GrindHouse, Memphis slowed its pace down and dominated the Clippers in the half-court, handcuffing Chris Paul (as relative a term as that is), bullying Blake Griffin, and evening the series with enough momentum that they might be favored, even with only one game left at home. As corny as all the "Wild Wild West" jokes have been over the years, this conference never ceases to be exciting.

- If only the same could be said of the East, where the Heat are a successful LeBron James assassination attempt away from returning to the Finals. Don't get any crazy ideas, Knick fans. And sorry, it's not happening otherwise.

- The Hindenburg of a season the Lakers just endured finally came to a crashing halt yesterday, fittingly punctuated by a childish outburst from Dwight Howard, and a blowout loss. After nearly decapitating Cory Joseph with an elbow in the first half, Howard picked up a 2nd technical soon after halftime for whining at the refs, earning him an early dismissal from what very well could be his final game in a Lakers uniform. Between Dwight's "amicable" conversation with Mitch Kupchak on his way off the floor, his departure being closely followed by Kobe Bryant's sideline presence, the open Twitter-bashing from Magic Johnson, the talk of open anti-Dwight locker room rifts, and his persistent demonstration that his maturity has yet to evolve beyond that of a 5-year-old, it's hard to see why the Lakers would want to the renew "The D12 Experience" beyond its first season.

- And finally, this Banter update would not be complete without a fond farewell to David Kahn; the Minnesota Timberwolves GM who, for years, managed to provide unparalleled excitement from the front office, making the most hilariously mind-numbing decisions while somehow keeping his job, until reality caught up with him and he was fired this week.

Always a favorite of this blog, Kahn will be remembered as a groundbreaking draft strategist, who helped troubled talents harvest the most in their abilities, always spent Free Agent dollars wisely, knew exactly which players to commit to, how to treat his stars, and never once made a stupid comparison in a Summer League interview between a borderline Hall of Famer and a deplorable Draft-bust who he had just signed. He was a visionary before his time; a victim of circumstance who tried to make the most of having the odds against him. That the Wolves are letting him go is not their loss, but all of ours.

Best of luck, David. And in the odd event some team doesn't hire you as their GM again, one last time:

KAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNN!

Enjoy the rest of the first round.

Banter's 2013 UnOfficial Awards

While the NBA does a reasonable job of handing out awards that honor players who've stood out in the regular season, the limited scope of six trophies leaves many deserving and shunned without recognition.

Though it many not be much consolation, those who've excelled in categories not recognized by the League ballots - but still made a memorable impression on this season, for better and worse - are getting their dues here, with Banter's UnOfficial Awards for 2013...

Bobby Boucher Trophy: James Harden, Houston Rockets

The player whose acquisition to a new team created the greatest positive impact.

Prior to last summer, Houston GM Darryl Morey had spent several well-chronicled seasons stockpiling middling tradeable assets in an attempt to land a premiere player; one capable of building a team around. He loaded his stash steadily, patiently waiting for the right opportunity. After factors of varying legitimacy thwarted his attempts to land Dwight Howard and Pau Gasol, it should have surprised no one that the guy leading the "Nerdy GM" Revolution had triggered a deal with fellow chief-geek Sam Presti to land James Harden before the rest of the NBA had any idea Harden was available.

What also came as little surprise was Harden's immediate explosion in a larger role, but within Houston's high-octane, shoot-first-ask-questions-later offense, his athletic combination of playmaking and versatile scoring was a perfect fit for a dominant ball-handler, and The Beard became even more Fearsome than before. Largely as a result, Houston's in the Playoffs (highly unlikely pre-trade), and Harden has given them what they've worked years for: a legitimate star.

Regards to: JR Smith, OJ Mayo, Nikola Vucevic

Simmons BeautyRest Award: Stephen Curry, Golden State Warriors

The player who had an exceptional season and was generally slept on very hard by the NBA community.

When posterity reflects upon the 2012-13 NBA Season, or the career of one Stephen Curry, there's going to be a glaring historical injustice concerning his absence on this season's West All-Star team. Certainly, this was some kind of miscount, or perhaps a covertly-coordinated attempt by all the opposing coaches he'd shredded to rob a "fringe All-Star"; certainly they hadn't all forgotten.

While praise and an All-Star jersey were heaped upon David Lee, Curry continued performing at an excellent level, exponentially more important to Golden State's offense than Lee, and (rebounding aside) a noticeably better defender. In his first season as the Warriors' backcourt lead, he made short debate of the decision to keep him and trade Monta Ellis. He stayed healthy and elevated his game while Andrew Bogut did neither, taking his team to the Playoffs, where few had slotted them.

That he wasn't an All-Star is a testament to ignorance. That he likely won't be All-NBA is a testament to the quality of guards in today's game. Regardless, his impact this season can't be completely swept under the rug.

Regards to: Kenneth Faried, Mike Conley, JJ Hickson

Canibus Award: Michael Beasley, Phoenix Suns

The player who was primed to blow up this season, had plenty of opportunity, and didn't amount to much.

Watching Mike Beasley play basketball is one of the most genuinely frustrating experiences known to fans of the game. Equipped with a rare blend of pure power and raw athleticism, he also possesses an outstanding offensive skill set and the ability to swing between forward spots, which all put together is a seemingly foolproof recipe for NBA success.

The words "seemingly" and "foolproof" are of particular importance in this case, as Beasley regularly defies convention with his selfish, disconnected play, and general lack of acknowledgement that preventing the other team from scoring helps win games. Even with a change of scenery - going from Minnesota's suddenly expectation-filled snowy abyss to a rebuilding desert oasis where he would have plenty of room to make a name for himself - he continued to tease with the occasional glimpse of dominance, while mainly lapsing listlessly through a forgettable season that's beginning to define a forgettable career.

Regards to: DeMarcus Cousins, Javale McGee, Kyle Lowry

Kevin Willis Memorial Award: Derek Fisher, Oklahoma City Thunder

The player who demonstrates outstanding devotion to the game, defying most laws of common sense and physics with an utter refusal to retire.

I'm not really sure why Derek Fisher's still playing basketball professionally; he's made a ton of money, won more championships than 99.9% of players who will ever suit up in the NBA, and must sincerely value time with his loved ones after his daughter overcame a rare life- threatening illness (Fisher confirmed as much when he made Dallas waive him so he could re-sign with the Thunder and be with his family in OKC).

At this point I've concluded either one of two things: a) Fisher sincerely loves the game, or b) Fisher sincerely feels bad enough about the way the lockout went that he's willing to martyr himself as an easy match-up for the players he helped squander many millions on behalf of.

Either way, he's living embodiment of what this award's all about.

Regards to: Kurt Thomas, Grant Hill, Jason Kidd, 

Energizer Bunny Award: Russell Westbrook, Oklahoma City Thunder

The player who just keeps going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going, and going...

If Westbrook weren't so emotionally volatile, it wouldn't be too crazy at this point to think he was some sort of secretly-developed cyborg.

Not only is he unbelievably stubborn, as though he were programmed with just one gear, but that gear is one of hyper-aggression; an overdrive that fuels a perpetual rage of insanely athletic energy that never takes a single play off and seems to escape normal human physical implications.

See, Westbrook not only goes all-out every possession, playing as though his life depended on it, but his body shows absolutely no signs of the strain and injury such extreme intensity usually leaves. Not only did he get through this season without missing a single game, but he's done the same each of his five years in the NBA, and apparently ever since high school. Westy's ability to keep himself on the court and involved in every play is truly without equal.

Regards to: Kobe Bryant, Kenneth Faried, LeBron James

Ham of the Year: Andrea Bargnani, Toronto Raptors 

The player who insulted expectations, his paycheck, and the game of basketball the most through continued dubiousness and a general resemblance to a roasted slab of meat.

Quite seldom does a player fall into a serious regression as he's entering the ostensible prime of his career without suffering a debilitating injury, but consider Bargnani the exception. He impeded any progress the Raptors had hoped to make this season by casually drifting through possessions while his albatross contract ate up cap space and potential trades like they were Molly caps at a Young Money release party.

Though Bargs has been dealing with nagging minor ailments, his lack of improvement and constant nonchalant aura since inking his big deal suggest he's more likely getting rich and lazy than the victim of a Greg Oden(/Andrew Bynum?)-style bodily flaw.

A prime amnesty candidate, Bargnani flashed the skill set to be a truly effective stretch 4, and the rare Euro big man to actually pan out, but now being paid like a star, he's fallen flatter than a Shaq free-throw for a team who took him first overall, hired his Italian manager to help acclimate him, gave him $50 million, and is now left shaking their heads.

Regards to: Pau Gasol, Kendrick Perkins, Ben Gordon

JR Rider Award: DeAndre Jordan on Brandon Knight

The season's best dunk.

We've seen it enough times. All you need to do is look at the photo to the right, and you know something devastating just happened.

Hindenburg Award: LA Lakers

Given to the NBA's biggest disaster.

It seems kind of unfair and redundant, but it can't be understated just how catastrophic this season was for the Lakers. Back in November, they were on the brink of hiring the best coach in the history of the NBA to remedy their maligned cast of Hall-of-Famers, but since courting - then abruptly dumping - him, have seen theatrics, nonchalance, lack of depth and injuries destroy their hopes of contending, punctuated a heinously ironic injury to Kobe Bryant, and mass uncertainty about the team's future. Rest in Peace, Dr Buss. Know how sincerely I say you're in a better place now.

Regards to: Philadelphia 76ers, Toronto Raptors, Sacramento Kings

Christopher Wallace Award: Andrew Bynum, Philadelphia 76ers

The player whose team was most hurt by his absence this season.

In a season where many-a-star seemed to be weathering some kind of injury, none of their franchise's seasons were as heavily weighted upon Bynum's full convalescence and the 76ers'. The perennially injured star center had a team of shooter and athletic swing players built around him, counting on his knee rehab to work their way.

Of course, Bynum seriously aggravated the injury in a much-hyped trip to his local bowling alley, shelving himself for the rest of the season in the process, and leaving Philly's roster up shit's creek, with only Jrue Holiday as a paddle. Without their new franchise player, the 76ers were rudderless and uninspiring, gradually dissolving as the season went along, and driving a steady veteran coach like Doug Collins - one noted for his growth of young talent (including a certain standout swingman during the late 80's) - to melt down and lash out at his team in a post-game presser, and eventually walk out on $4.5 million to lead them again next year.

While the Sixers wait on lottery balls and clean out their lockers earlier than anyone expected when Bynum donned their threads, at least they have the comfort of knowing they didn't give up any quality big men who could've served as insurance if he went down. Oh, wait...

Regards to: The Los Angeles Lakers, Kevin Love, Derrick Rose

2013 Banter NBA Awards

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!

Coming to you live from the Halifax Forum it's the 2013 Basketball Banter Awards, on Eastlink local cable!

We've got plenty of awards to hand out tonight, and unfortunately our host Michael Jordan couldn't make it this evening (something about a scheduling conflict), so without further ado, here are tonight's nominees!

Rookie of the Year, presented by Thomas Ian Nicholas and Gary Busey:  Bradley Beal, Anthony Davis, Andre Drummond, Damian Lillard, Dion Waiters

Defensive Player of the Year, presented by Ray Lewis and Maurice Levy: Tyson Chandler, Marc Gasol, Paul George, Lebron James, Joakim Noah

Coach of the Year, presented by Phil Jackson and Mike Rice: Gregg Popovich, Erik Spoelstra, Tom Thibodeau, Mike Woodson, Doug Collins, Frank Vogel

Sixth Man of the Year, presented by Bronn and The Hound: Ryan Anderson, Jamal Crawford, Jarrett Jack, Andre Miller, JR Smith

Most Improved Player, presented by Macklemore and Psy: Omer Asik, Paul George, Jrue Holiday, Larry Sanders, Nikola Vucevic

Most Valuable Player, presented by Adam Silver and Mikhail Prokhorov: Carmelo Anthony, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Durant, Lebron James, Chris Paul

....and now, the moment you've all been waiting for (seriously, let's just get to the after-party), the winners are....

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR: Damian Lillard, Portland Trailblazers
What was seemingly Davis' award to lose heading into the season has, in fact, been lost, unfortunately for him it seemed, before he even got to stake his claim. While Davis put up a reasonable rookie campaign amid some concerns about his durability and frame at the NBA level, Lillard showed out for Portland, blitzing defenses with ridiculous quickness off the bounce, and an impressive set of moves for a 6'3" rookie. His playmaking ability is adept for a score-first guard, and while the NBA game hasn't come completely naturally to him (he's struggled on defense most of the season, particularly on-the-ball), he's by all accounts a gym-rat with a devotion to improving. Either way, for 2013, Dame Dash is the clear rookie chart-topper.

All-Rookie Teams:

First Team: G-Damian Lillard, G-Bradley Beal, F-Mo Harkless F-Anthony Davis, C-Andre Drummond

Second Team: G-Dion Waiters, G/F*Michael Kidd-Gilchrist (the asterisk denoting that the Bobcats didn't really have anything coherently resembling an offense this year, so slotting MKG here in a very thin rookie class isn't much of a stretch) F- Harrison Barnes, F- John Henson, C- Jonas Valanciunas

DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR: Joakim Noah, Chicago Bulls
The  Bulls' somewhat-controversial dismantling of the Miami Heat's historic win streak was a simple microcosm of what this team's about: brutally efficient defensive execution; it's what Tom Thibodeau was sought for by teams League-wide, and it's paid dividends with the Bulls' MVP on the shelf for most of the past two seasons.

That they pulled off that particular upset without Joakim Noah is drenched in irony, as Noah has been the heart, soul and spine of this team's defense for several seasons, and knowing Derrick Rose would be out for most (perhaps all?) of this season, he ratcheted his game up to the next level, becoming the League's most versatile post defender. A constant threat to not only disrupt big men and own the glass, but quick enough to get in front of any penetrating wingman, with the length and athleticism to make them think twice about a return trip. His increased court awareness and leadership in Rose's absence showed especially on D, where he never fell into the lapses that plagued him post-contract, fueling the system that kept Chicago above water through a litany of injuries.

All-Defensive Teams:

First Team: G-Tony Allen, G-Dwyane Wade, F-LeBron James, F-Joakim Noah, C-Marc Gasol

Second Team: G-Mike Conley, G-Chris Paul, F-Paul George, F-Serge Ibaka, C-Roy Hibbert

COACH OF THE YEAR: Mike Woodson, New York Knicks 
In a category that's defined by subjectivity and un-expectation, Woodson has risen to the top of this year's coaching crop by taking an oddly-cobbled, aging Knicks team, and turning them into the unquestioned Eastern bridesmaids with a unique inside-out attack that has had to take many forms amid numerous injuries.
Aside from adjusting his lineup all year through a perpetually-rotating cast of players, Woodson did many remarkable things this season:

First, he vastly exceeded expectations in the rabid Mecca, which between the fans, the media, the pressure, the presence of Jim Dolan, and everything else plaguing the Knicks, takes a minor miracle. Moreover, he took on a newly-assembled team with several "character issues" guys and steered them clear of any cereal-unrelated disasters. In a season of metrics-based innovation, he crafted the NBA's most devastating inside-out attack around a player (Tyson Chandler) with no low-post game, and a player (Carmelo Anthony) who wasn't very fond of posting up often, or doing things the coach's way. In convincing Melo to take more minutes at the 4-spot, Woodson was also able to make Anthony see the light that "passing can be a good thing" (consequently, a player who arguably had the most prove of anyone in the NBA this year enjoyed the best season of his career). Beyond all this, perhaps most impressive was Woodson's breakthrough with JR Smith (clearly an expert after repeatedly butting heads with the other athletic "J.Smith" who was taken as a high schooler in the teens of the '04 Draft), turning him from a talented but generally disruptive potential-journeyman into:

SIXTH MAN OF THE YEAR: JR Smith, New York Knicks
You should really see the look on my face right now. If there were a "Ron Artest Wins the Citizenship Award" Award for the words I'm most shocked to be writing this season, this is a sweep:

Smith made a name for himself in the NBA as an explosive scorer who could carry any second unit offensively, but did little else, loved the continual self-dial, and conducted himself in a manner that not-so-seldom made headlines for the wrong reasons. After spending a year in China during the lockout, it was unclear what Smith's role would be upon signing with New York; even less clear how the Garden's bright lights would cast him.

Early on, Smith made an impact; as advertised, he was a lethal shooter but his game seemed to evolve; he was penetrating more, keeping defenses honest, scoring near the hoop, and getting to the line at a greater rate, becoming a much more efficient offensive weapon. This was an astonishing development after years of urging from numerous coaches had proven futile. Even more shocking, he was defending and rebounding aggressively, while playing an important role in the Knicks' pass-heavy offense, completing the full-on transformation from apparent selfish knucklehead to vital role player, while using Twitter hilariously as an outlet for his impulsive attention-getting, rather than fighting with refs and coaches.

Smith's play led to increased minutes - a career high 33.5 as of now - which naturally left him on the floor more often in the clutch, where that once-pseudo-swag he carried himself with found meaning, hitting numerous big shots to help secure wins, which puts the icing on this cake and the 6MOY in JR Smith's humble hands. Strange times we're living in.

MOST IMPROVED PLAYER: Paul George, Indiana Pacers
Some people might find it puzzling that I don't have the guy who's likely to win this award (James Harden) included even as a nominee. While Harden's certainly come onto his new scene in a big way, becoming a Top-10 guy with the Rockets this year, it's not as though he's improved tremendously as a basketball player. He was the most under-utilized player in the NBA last year, and still posted one of the best seasons in 6th Man history. He was named to Team USA in the summer, and happily given a max contract by the guy who's very much looking like the smartest GM in the League at the moment. Now the clear #1 on a Houston squad with the fastest-paced (read: stat-bloating) game, it's only natural he'd be putting up numbers like he is.

Meanwhile, George underwent an evolution that was far less guided; one that saw him make significant statistical strides on one of the slowest-paced (read: stat-constricting) teams while having to work harder in a new role that was unexpectedly thrown at him. When trigger-happy Danny Granger went down early, the onus was on PG to become the Pacers' offensive leader (almost by committee) and get over his apparent hesitance to create his own shot. It didn't take too long for George to not only become confident in that role, but display the kind of ability to render Granger to sudden trade bait, while also upping his play on D to an elite level. His baptism-by-fire emergence is the biggest reason the short-handed Pacers will be a 50-win team (other than the depth of the Eastern Conference) and a total contrast to Harden's likely illogical victory in this category.

All-NBA Teams: 

First Team: G-Chris Paul, G-Kobe Bryant, F-Lebron James, F-Kevin Durant, C-Marc Gasol

Second Team: G-Russell Westbrook, G-Tony Parker, F-Carmelo Anthony, F-Tim Duncan, C-Joakim Noah

Third Team: G-Stephen Curry, G-James Harden, F-Paul George, F-Blake Griffin, C-Brook Lopez

MOST VALUABLE PLAYER: LeBron James, Miami Heat 
The final award of the evening is a total anti-climax, defeating the entire purpose of leaving it for last, but I digress... In a season where several players put up what otherwise would be very compelling MVP arguments, LeBron silenced all. The performance he delivered this season has made people legitimately discuss the idea of a living player possibly being as good or better than Michael Jordan, and not be thrown in an insane asylum. And that's really that needs to be said.

The All-League Pass Team

As most of you already know, NBA League Pass is probably the greatest invention since the wheel and has revolutionized the way we watch our favorite game (and if you don't, you really need to).

Not only are all games available at the touch of a button, but teams and players who were seldom seen outside the quiet realms of local TV are now being exposed to a national audience, their status only further proliferating with the explosion of social media and the (awesome) sudden ability for the random thoughts of JR Smith to make him an internet celebrity. 

The excessive abundance of selection forces one to prioritize: There's certain players who are simply must-see additions to any well-balanced night of NBA channel-surfing; guys who for a variety of reasons - both related to their basketball skills and otherwise - are simply too entertaining to pass up. 

The regular season's winding down, and awards are due out soon. So as a warm-up, here's a nod to the excellence of those who, night in and night out, kept us on the edge of our seats; who threaten to do something completely unforgettable whenever they step onto the court: The All-League Pass Team

Close Cuts - Michael Beasley (the prototype for a "guy who should be really good, is amusing to watch from an unintentional hilarity point of view, but ultimately too frustrating), Gerald Green (stopped dunking a lot/playing basketball well), Ricky Rubio (spent too much of this year injured/on early curfew), Tim Duncan and Kobe Bryant (as amazing as they are at this age, it's not like we're seeing anything new from them), Steph Curry (casualty of an elite PG class), Josh Smith (has toned down his dunking, can no longer fight w/ Mike Woodson nightly), JR Smith (has toned down his erratic shooting and refuses to fight w/ Mike Woodson nightly), Tony Allen (one of the NBA's best players at losing the ball on the way to the hoop, regaining possession, drawing contact from an innocent bystander and completing the and-one defenders) the J. Crawfords (painful exclusions), Blake Griffin (a unanimous pick if Lebron and Durant weren't having two of the best seasons in recent memory) and DeMarcus Cousins (I really enjoy watching highly-skilled big men who regularly scream at their teammates mid-game for not getting them the ball enough, but every time I tune into a Kings game, I'm expecting to hear he's caught a CDT suspension and isn't with the team)

and now without further ado, the 2013 All-League Pass Team:

G - Chris Paul, Los Angeles Clippers  

Only so much needs to be said about the brilliance of a player who consistently averages more steals than turnovers and is a Lebron James-in-his-prime away from being the NBA's most complete offensive player. Paul - in his awe-imposing physical stature - regularly and methodically destroys opposing defenses however he sees fit, utilizing his own seemingly endless arsenal of moves, while also conducting a smooth-flowing basketball symphony, helping teammates hit high notes they couldn't without him. He plays with a tremendous IQ and the leadership ability to make it permeate through the rest of a once-mocked franchise that's considered among the legit contenders. It's must-see TV.

G - Russell Westbrook, Oklahoma City Thunder

Westbrook's (by a very wide margin) the sharpest double-edge entertainment threat in professional basketball. Not only is he an insanely athletic, skilled and well-built guard who goes hard every game and is never short on highlight-reel material, but he's also one of the League's most highly-combustible players, prone to emotional blowups and occasional spans of on-court judgement that force you to question his mental development. There's very few point guards who cram on seven-footers as regularly and casually as Westbrook, and even fewer who've let a 5-second violation create a fight during and timeout and then flee to the locker room in distress. When their team was up 20. 

F- Lebron James, Miami Heat
This weighs on me personally because I don't want to watch the Miami Heat. I hate most things about their team, and find myself rooting against them in 99% of games. Despite this, the rational side of me usually wrestles some screen time for South Beach, because despite my feelings, it's hard to turn away. They play an engaged, unique, and energetic brand of basketball that's well-executed and (pretty much naturally) produces more than its share of poster shots. While the entire team has been playing out of their minds - not only individually but as a unit - a lot of this stems from Lebron James quite simply dominating this game on a level right now that only Michael Jordan has ever exceeded. Plain and simple. And if you don't want to watch that, then you're not a basketball fan.

F - Kevin Durant, Oklahoma City Thunder
"Video Game Mode" is a term that's been gaining some steam in sports conversations these days. For those born after 1980 and not living in Siberia, it's an obvious reference, but in case you're a Siberian NBA fan, "Video Game Mode" is an homage to NBA Jam/Courtside with Kobe Bryant/Hangtime/Live/Street/ 2KWhatever, and the unrealistically good play spawned therein. Whether through poor game design, the "Easy" difficulty setting and "Off" fatigue toggling, a user calling his superstar's number on every single play, or the sudden ability to leap 40 feet in the air for a quintuple-flip while igniting the ball in flames during a dunk, players just seemed to be able to do a lot of shit that just seemed... Skeptical. This term most often applies to cases of overt offensive dominance, where a particular player shows a ruthless unwillingness to miss, as though he's discovered a cheat code that sends every shot out his hands straight through the mesh. This term also most often applies to Kevin Durant, which is why he's a no-brainer starter on this team.

C - Javale McGee, Denver Nuggets
What Javale McGee has managed to do with his NBA career is truly fascinating. He exists in the minds of some as much (and in others even more) a social media entity as an actual basketball player. McGee became a staple of the YouTube/Twitter generation with his death-defying dunk attempts, and displays of general cluelessness both on-court (sprinting back on D when his own team had possession, or perhaps nearly killing James Jones after attempting to jump over him from the foul line and dunk), and on the mic (making an ambiguously-racist, live-national-TV reference to a certain Shaquille O'Neal segment), while confounding coaches with his inconsistent play. Javale is helping to maintain the NBA's social media profile with his tomes of wisdom and sagacious antics is almost like a second job; the Denver Nuggets are paying him a shade under $11 million this season, and bringing him off the bench for 18 minutes/game, so he has plenty of time on his hands. You might think such sparse appearances would make him a longshot for this team, but call McGee this team's "character guy" - if you're only looking at his on-court production, you're missing the whole picture.